this is very, very bad.

Rating: 2/10 (13 March 2006)

I haven't read the Illiad, or any of Homer's works. I know very little about Greek history. There may be inconsistencies with the original stories, as people have said already  I wouldn't have noticed anyway. From what I hear there might have been quite a few opportunities missed out on by the writer's choice of omissions. But artistic license aside, this movie is awful. Here's why: 1. The sets are dull and uninteresting. Troy looks like a giant sandcastle.
2. Brad Pitt is absolutely terrible. I think I got what he was trying to do; I think I understood that Achilles was meant to be arrogant etc, but his performance was stilted and just generally pretty crap. He made Achilles seem a bit of a f*nny.
3. Why does Hollywood always insist on giving Greeks Scottish and Irish accents?? This is really off-putting, perhaps because I'm Scottish it made some of the characters sound like my dad.
4. Where did all the wood come from? 5. Paris needs a slap. I don't like Orlando Bloom anyway but he just played the part of a simpering wee ninny in this.
6. That bloody music!! That woman was screeching in the background like a horny cat literally every ten minutes for the whole agonising three hours.
7. HECTOR! HECTOR! HECTOR! HECTOR! HECTOR! HECTOR! HECTOR! HECTOR! HECTOR! HECTOR! HECTOR! HECTOR! HECTOR! HECTOR! This particular scene, where Brad Pitt stands outside Troy calling for Hector to come out and fight him, lasted for what seemed like about half an hour. JUST GO, FOR GOD'S SAKE!! MAKE HIM SHUT UP!!!
There were other things I disliked about this film, but I can't remember them all as it was quite a while ago that I saw it. Nevertheless, it did prove to be a very enjoyable cinema-going experience, although I don't think I was meant to find it so funny. It was certainly memorable anyway.