"Give us your money - and your life"

Rating: 1/10 (28 October 2006)

How did they spend so many MILLIONS of dollars, and come up with a film looking so cheesy, like it was produced by AIP in the mid-'60s? Except of course that AIP Roger Corman was actually a decent director who just worked a little too swiftly; and, also to his credit, he read books, and knew a little something about history.
It is clear nobody connected to "Troy" is literate; or perhaps, like Peter O'Toole, they had one glass of the Irish too many.
This movie is a LIE. Why don't the fanboys and girls get that? They are being LIED to. This is not history; this is not Homer; this isn't even a good adventure film. This is just pandering to the lowest common denominator - if you like this movie, count yourself among the ignorant, and count yourself among the screwed; bend over, drop 'em, and let some other studio hack plug it in while ripping your money out of your designer jeans.
There's no dialog here, no story, no interesting characters, no believable emotion, no reasoning, no sense, no acting; just shoddy visuals, and a completely unreal depiction of combat - just the sort of thing you need to watch if you want to go to Iraq and get your head blown off just to make Dick Cheney richer.
Those who do not know history are destined to get screwed. This is one of the biggest rip-offs to come out of commercial cinema ever - that's its only claim to any historical truth, as far as I can tell.