Troy - finally something for women

Rating: 5/10 (13 January 2005)

Finally, porn for women. Amidst the the art directors' carefree attitude towards history, the unfortunate script writing, and the fact that we're numb to the special effects used in epic films these days, this was a great movie to watch over a glass of wine! Gals, we've been waiting for this. Men in little leathery skirts with hemlines that barely reach the outward curve of their thighs - and these guys keep falling down, legs akimbo. I have not seen so many tanned and taught legs since the time I sneaked into the gay dance party one summer long ago. I have now stolen Brad Pitt's hairdo, and looking frantically about for those wonderful little golden hair accessories the princes of Troy were so fond of. Anyway, all joking aside, it's an action movie people! It wasn't all that bad, just not what one would hope. But what it did turn out to be was a visual feast for the eyes with men who speak in complete sentences, look great even with blood on them, and remind us of the time we gals ogled the hunter gatherers. Besides, there are so many gorgeous and talented actors in one place - Brad Pitt, Sean Bean, Orlando Bloom, Eric Bana, Vincent Regan, et al. One for every weeknight after a long day's work. So, if you want to be reminded how smart you are, see a documentary. If you're alone on a Friday night, rent this movie.