War epic+Soap Opera Dialoge=Movie not easy to swallow

Rating: 3/10 (10 November 2005)

**Some Spoilers** I really wanted to like this film and that's how I went into it. I came out trying to figure out what the heck I just watched. This movie was like the lovechild of Gladiator and Beverly Hills 90210. It suffers from bad dialog and too much butchery of the original epic. I understand the need to make changes when you are making a movie out of something like the Iliad. But whoever wrote the screenplay for this went too far. There were some good parts to it, which kept me from fleeing the theater. 1. Sean Bean-One of Hollywood's most underrated talents, Sean shines as Odysseus. At least, the writers were smart enough to give him some of the best lines.
2. Eric Bana-He is perfect as Hector a loyal and tragic hero.
3. The fighting-There were some really good fight scenes in this film, some of them on par with the battles in Lord of the Rings. However, that is the only thing about this film that even comes close to touching any film in that series.
Now, for the bad points.
1. Helen-This character had some of the most vomit-inducing lines I have ever seen. What is this, a Greek war film or a Soap Opera? Her husband insists that he wants to kill her. I can't say I blame him. After listening to her talk for about five minutes, I want her dead too. I do not blame Helen Kruger for this and I hope she gets another chance to shine. I blame whoever gave her these lines and made her play such an annoying character. Are we supposed to believe that this is the woman that two nations go to war over? Sorry, no sale.
2. Brad Pitt-I don't know how much Brad got for this movie, but someone should see about getting that money back. As far as acting for tough guys goes, Pitt did a better job in Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Here, he plays a self-centered jackass with pecs and that's it.
3. Orlando Bloom-Without giving away too much, I suspect most of the changes from the Iliad in this movie were made to suit Bloom's fans. If that's the case, then Orlando should not have been cast as Paris, because Paris is a very hate-able character, both in the movie as well as the poem. That is why what happens to him at the end is so hard to swallow. He lives! And gets away with Helen, the other annoying character. If the script writers wanted to change something, they should have had Hector live.
Bottom line-This movie is only a shadow of Lord of the Rings. Watch this only if you are really bored and have a high tolerance for bad dialog. Bana and Bean fans might like it if they skip certain parts.