Not bad but I suggest watching Gladiator!

Rating: 6/10 (9 June 2004)

In the year of the epic this one stood out for me as the most excitable. The other big one left is King Arthur and as a fan of Excalibur I thought that they would have a tough time beating that. Also we have not as yet seen a large scale version of the Trojan wars. It is a story that screams out for a big screen adaptation. Impenetrable fortresses, super warriors and giant wooden horses it doesn't get much better.
As far as your standard epics this is somewhere in the middle. Not great but certainly not that bad either. In terms of spectacle it is fantastic. The film looks superb and has some truly massive battles. In many ways though it offers nothing we haven't seen even more impressively in LOTR. I now the basic details of Homer's story so in terms of peoples complaints that it doesn't stay true enough to the text I couldn't really comment on, but it does have what I wanted to see, the giant wooden horse.
The cast are good. You have a big array of talent all on top form. Firstly though the negative side. Brad Pitt. Now just to point out, I'm not an anti-Brad person. I'm in the minority who thinks he doesn't get enough appreciation for his acting. In Troy however he seems to Brad Pitt, too much like he is putting on an accent and acting. It's not natural and it seems very much like the makers are milking the fact that this is Brad Pitt, much like Cruise was milked in the Last Samurai. As an action man he manages to convince however. He's in great shape in this movie. In fact he has put on a lot of muscle and kept his trademark six pack, the ladies will be happy. Eric Bana is superb as Hector. He also makes a good action man and he is basically Troy's super warrior whereas Achilles (Pitt) is the Greeks super warrior, albeit one who hates his king and can't be controlled. Orlando Bloom is okay but for the guy who causes all this trouble over a bit of skirt he certainly seems to disappear from the film for lengthy spells. Brian Cox is as usual superb in a villainous role as Agamemnon. Is he really supposed to be that evil though, I remember Agamemnon was in Time Bandits played by Sean Connery and he was a stand up bloke. Brendan Gleeson is also good as is Peter O'Toole. Not forgetting Mr Sean Bean as well who is good as ever, if underused. As for Diane Kruger as the trouble making wench Helen. She is really required to do little else than be pretty (and did they have make-up in those days? because she doesn't half wear a lot of slap.).
The films action and effects are as you would expect from a reportedly 200million dollar epic, first rate. The action really crunches, particularly with one-on-one encounters. The fight between Achilles' and Hector is excellent stuff. The battle scenes are impressive but as I said before they aren't as good as LOTR because of the ingenious way Jackson can use effects, he is a master.
The story has problems for me. Not the screenplay as such, but the original text. They had a lot of stories from all those thousands of years ago that can seem at times pretty stupid. They didn't really mind plot holes back then. Yes people will say this is an epic love story, but those people will be females who love Orlando Bloom and want to mother his children. This fool Paris steals away the king of Spartas wife and then starts a war that will probably mean the destruction and death of his kingdom, all for a woman. No offence to Diane Kruger but there is not woman alive who looks good enough for that! I might for Jennifer Connelly though. The real hum-dinger is the fact that the Greeks supposedly seem to have left the shores of Troy having left a giant wooden horse, just large enough to house 500 Greek soldiers with adequate room for toilet facilities and a pool table. Then they decide to bring it into their impenetrable fortress. I reckon that Homer couldn't think of a realistic way that the walls of Troy could be breached so he decided that the Greeks should be let in, then he thought 'I'll have them hide inside a giant horse'. To be honest they did kind of deserve to get slaughtered, and Blooms head should have been put on a spike to show the world what a Muppet looks like. Yes I'm getting sarcastic now but this is a problem, you cannot side with the Trojans. Effectively Greece are the oppressors and the bad guys and the audience should be siding with the Trojans but they aint half stupid. The human side of the story and the characterisation doesn't allow you to get close to a character. You can't help but dislike Paris for being a fool and having a girly name. You can't help but think that Achilles is being acted out by someone. Peter O'Toole as the King of Troy I didn't like either, he should have given Paris a damn good thrashing when he came waltzing in with Helen Of Sparta, and sent them both back. He kept listening to crap advice ahead of sensible advice too. As far as rooting for characters the only one who is given a good human dimension who we can root for is Hector and Bana is very good in his role.
As for the sound and the music in this film. Well the sound is excellent. When people get sliced into two you can really here the cracking of bone cartilage. Every penetration of sword buzzes and vibrates from the rafters to your chair and into your spine. Really great sound design in this and as with most films of this scale it is pretty much got it's name down as an Oscar nomination for the sound. The score however will not. It is a big let down. Apparently they had an original score done then they dumped it and hired a new composer to do it coming up with something that is so standard epic and 'lets rip off Gladiator' that it becomes intrusive at times and at other times doesn't affect you enough.
Overall though this is a good popcorn muncher. It doesn't have any great depth that an epic really must have to become a classic, and certainly I preferred Last Samurai this year in the battle for number one epic. Thus far it has been a bit disappointing as none have come close to Gladiator. LOTR is kind of an epic but it is more fantasy as well. I suppose I'll count them as epics but that means that King Arthur and also Alexander will have an even higher, probably unobtainable standard to beat. Thus far Troy comes third in the year of the epic behind Passion Of Christ and behind current leader The Last Samurai.***