A Popcorn Film

Rating: 6/10 (25 June 2009)

What I mean by popcorn isn't the stuff you take in the theater with you, but that like popcorn the film has little nutritional value. That's what Michael Bay does. He doesn't make wholesome stuff like Dark Knight or Wall-E. He isn't trying to. Why? Because we eat it up anyways. Should we expect better? Yes. Should we eat better? Yes. Are we going to stop? No. There will always be a place for popcorn and the Michael Bay film.
Michael Bay. You either tolerate him or you hate him. He is who he is and he doesn't try to be anyone else. I don't care for him but don't hate him. If you've seen his other films you know what you're getting. They are all basically the same loud explosions and hot women. His films should be better, and would be if they were handled by someone else, but if you take them for what they are they're usually enjoyable.
This film is more of the same. If you saw T1 you know what to expect. If you loved the first you'll probably enjoy this one. If you didn't care for T1 your opinion won't change. Some stuff is better, some is worse, and some is exactly the same.
What's better?
Now that we know the story the movie dives right into good old robot action. Now instead of five minutes of people being told what's going on they can just do things. They don't have to explain who Optimus is, he can just transform, roll out, and kick butt.
Bay figured out how to show the bots fighting in the film. Last time the camera was five feet away and you couldn't tell who's foot or arm that was and what was going on. This time Bay pulled the camera back so we could see the robots in their full glory. A vast improvement.
Speaking of robot action, Optimus kicks serious butt. In the first he had two fights, one was too short and the other he was mostly losing. This time he's taking on three at once and he's fighting enemies twice his size. Optimus fans won't be disappointed.
The Decepticons actually get their own scenes and get to do more than just spout a line or two and randomly destroy things. Megatron and Starscream get more bickering. It's not quite like their original series appearance but they do more than in T1.
In T1 the Autobot's dialog, especially in their intro, were too campy. This time it's much more real. They're not talking like an 80s cartoon anymore but like someone from today. There's no Optimus saying "My bad."
What's the same?
Plenty of big, fun, loud action sequences. If you don't like those things, why are you going to see a Michael Bay film? It's what he does and he does it well. The explosions and CGI look top notch.
Megan Fox continues to be the best looking character in the film. Bay isn't afraid to show he is a man. He clearly loves making hot women look sexy. More than he likes making robots look cool.
Bay can't figure out what to cut from the film. There's still too many scenes that distract from the plot and go on far too long. There was Sam looking for the glasses in the first, and there's Judy getting high in this one. Bay may love that character and think those scenes are the best but they could have been cut down and the movie would flow so much better. I just wanted those scenes to get over with and move on. There's a dozen scenes that simply go on too long that could have been cut down and gotten the same effect. A half hour could have easily have been cut.
What's worse?
The Twins will go down as Bay's Jar Jar Binks. Like Jar Jar you can't help but notice the racial undertones. Bay's reasoning that he wants more personality in the bots is a poor excuse for useless racism. Like Jar Jar they pull attention away from other useful bots. They serve no purpose in the story other than to be funny. Like Jar Jar their humor is poor and pulls attention from the successful humor of Bumblebee. Bumblebee was a great comedic relief because it didn't come off as stupid, but this time he has few funny moments.
There's about 40 bots in the film but only 8 or 9 are explored in any way. It's nice that they included more fan favorites but not when you rarely see them let alone hear them speak. I would have much preferred that Arcee taken the Twin's places in the story. She might have given Mikaela someone to talk to rather than complaining. While Starscream and Megatron have more time all the other returning bots have less.
This movie is all over the place in terms of plot. The first was simple: find the Allspark and protect it. This film they're trying to defeat the Decepticons, protect Sam, find a couple of different objects, destroy some machine, and defeat the Fallen. Problem is there's so little plot to begin with that dividing it up makes it worse.
The first one blew me away because it was so much better than I thought it would be. This one is about what I expect from Bay. I enjoyed it but not quite like the first one. The first one I wished that there were a few things better. This one I wish there were a lot of things better.