Great if you're a 12-year-old boy

Rating: 2/10 (28 June 2009)

I went into this movie with moderately low expectations, but sadly I was expecting way too much. I figured the plot would take a back seat to the action and special effects, and I assumed the effects would be great. While I was right on both counts, I was stunned at how painfully long the movie felt - not how long it WAS, as I knew the run-time, but how excruciatingly dragged out it felt as I was sitting in the theater. If I hadn't been at the theater with friends, I would have walked out early on. Regrettably, I stayed for the whole thing. So many of the scenes seemed completely worthless, as they did nothing to further the plot. I was also surprised by the content of many truly inane, tasteless scenes: the mindless, grade-school humor, the borderline (borderline?) racist depictions, the jarring dialogue. These are all sins that can be easily forgiven if one is a pubescent boy. Michael Bay obviously knows his audience; it's too bad I didn't realize in time that I wasn't meant to be a part of it.