If you have forgotten what it felt like to be a kid, go and criticize something else.

Rating: 8/10 (22 June 2009)

Food critics judging the best and most expensive gastronomic restaurants in the world will not go to the local fish and chips or burger place and afterward write an angry diatribe on how unexpectedly crappy and unfathomably cheap and disgusting it all was.
Most of us the plebe, who are not paid to criticize the work of others, will still eat every now and then these wonderfully unhealthy burgers and have a great time. It is fatty, may not be animal friendly, may not be good for the planet and does not contain foie gras, caviar or saffron. Yet, we eat one with pleasure!
This is I feel a good analogy with this film and the reception "licenced" critics, and even some free-lance ones, gave to it. It is not Kubrik, Cohen, Lee, Hitchcock, Wenders, Kurosawa. It is not about a man who wasn't there, not about two gay cowboys horse-riding in picturesque mountains and not about the changing morality of a rich physician.
It is made by Michael Bay, and it is about Transformers. Great! Pearl Harbour was a serious theme, too serious for Micheal Bay. Transformers is just what he needs. I do not say Bay is a poor Director. Give "Tranformers" to Clint Eastwood...oh God have Mercy.
Seriously, what did you expect? Optimus Prime, prostrated on the All Spark, staring with a troubled metallic frown at an exhaust, asking "to be or not to be"?
I am not a teenage boy. I am a 32 years old scientist with a taste for varied entertainment. I had a lot of fun watching this movie. There are holes in it, it would be better with a tight plot, but so what? The very nature of Transformers does not make sense anyway.
Actors did their part too. Acting was fine, perhaps not perfect. Just remember, they are asked to act in front of a big empty space, or maybe a cardboard face of a robot suspended ten feet in the air, later replaced by CGI entities beating the crap our of each others. Who could do as well as they do, I wonder. I'll give them excuses for their lack of perfection. Shia LaBeouf and Megan Fox, together with John Turturro and the rest of the cast, build a good and believable cast.
The audience this movie targets is quite difficult to define. At times I thought the humour was a little bit too Disney-ish, which targets obviously little kids, but the next moment the wonderfully under-dressed backside of either Megan Fox or Isabel Lucas zoomed on the screen. It was very nice, but I do not think I would have been pleased to bring a kid to see this. I hope Michael Bay will decide for whom Transformers is next time.
My mark is 8/10. I would have removed about 10 minutes from the final battle. Would have liked more substance to less robots. Less plot holes. Less silly cartoon comedy. REMOVE the annoying twin robots, they make it hard to take Optimus Prime and the Autobots seriously. Finally, Hasbro should let Michael Bay a bit more freedom: it is product placement at its worse. That being said, we are not forced to buy any toys, are we? I bought my last transformers 10 years ago...yes, I know, I was 22, but the alternate form was a great red ant. I could not resist. Besides, the new toys do not make justice to the robots in the film!