It was just... boring.

Rating: 2/10 (19 January 2011)

I hadn't watched the first Transformers film when I saw this at the cinema, so I really wasn't sure what to expect, but I really hated what I saw.
For starters, I don't understand why the film had to be two-and-a-half hours in length. The story was hardly brimming with development, so really for that to make sense it had to either have some good action scenes, some funny moments or some character development. It had none.
Now, the action scenes are exactly what Transformers should be good at, and I must admit that first sequence actually got my hopes up in this department. It was flashy and it looked cool, but that was the only scene that did. After that, all the fights consisted of metal lumps clunking together, and if I wanted to see that I'd go home and hit to pieces of cutlery against each other for a few minutes.
Funny moments. Well, they made attempts to do this, and I couldn't call them boring. Though I would say all their attempts at humour actively offended me. Not in a hurt-feelings way, but just because they were so bad. Some jokes just didn't make sense, like the 'swine flu' thing. Clearly that was thrown in at the last minute, and I just don't understand why.
And then there's the twins. It's too easy to pick on them, when I've seen that even the most ardent defenders of this film sheepishly admit that they were a horrible, horrible part of the movie. It is very difficult to enjoy a film though, when you have those rolling hunks of half-baked sassy lines and clunky "laugh-at-me" delivery.
The characters I didn't end up caring less about. None of them showed any personality. I couldn't really pick a strength or fault in any of their personas, because they don't have one. I'm struggling to think of anything to say about them because they're just so bland and predictable.
For the most part, this film is just no interesting, and the only scenes that really pulled me out of a state of boredom were just there to really annoy me. I could go into great detail about the university lecture bit, but it would be pure pedantry on my part when it's just easier to say that this movie is awful.