Lots of "boom" with no soul

Rating: 3/10 (24 June 2009)

I walked into 'Transformers 2' expecting to have the same mindless summer fun I got two years ago with the original movie... and I got mindless, alright.
I wonder who told Michael Bay that making an action movie consists of slamming as many action sequences in as little time as possible, with no plot whatsoever? Everything that made 'Transformers' a great summer movie is either lost or overkilled in this one: the story is almost non-existent and silly, the characters (both on the human and robot side of things) feel dull and the new ones are irrelevant, the script introduces a bunch of plot points that go nowhere and just add irrelevance to the already too long movie, including an attempt to a "jealousy arc" between Sam and Mikaela that ends in the most absurd way possible, and so quickly that you wonder why was it there in the first place; the comedy is overdone in a shameful way: from the 800,000 intended jokes they land 4 or 5, and the return of Sam's parents is useless: this time they're not even annoying in an entertaining way.
I'd like to think that the writers Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman were too busy doing 'Star Trek' to really pay attention to this movie, because otherwise; I'm gonna have to say they failed miserably on this attempt. This is way too brain-dead to make it enjoyable and this time you don't empathize with any of the good guys and don't buy any of the bad guys as a serious villain for more than 3 minutes. Sure, there is a ton of giant robot carnage; but it never seems transcendent. (Tiny spoiler to come) Devastator, who initially comes as this huge, scary threat suffers from what a friend of mine smartly called "stormtrooper syndrome", and ended up being comedic relief and dying in a totally anti-climactic way. Even the new supposed "ultimate villain" is got a minor role in the film and you don't buy him for a second.
I wouldn't recommend seeing this to anyone who is looking for even a little piece of wit in a movie. Watch the trailers and teasers instead and they'll give you everything that is worthy about the movie; and save yourself the money for movie tickets.