Robot Scenes=10/10 The Rest? Not So Much

Rating: 3/10 (3 July 2009)

I'm 17, so I was supposed to love Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen right? It had everything from Optimus Prime to Megan Fox. What's not to like? The answer: plenty.
Don't get me wrong, I'm a Michael Bay fan. I loved Armageddon and Bad Boys, and I was a fan of the first Transformers film. But Bay messed up big time with the sequel. Normally, I'd try to find ways to defend Bay, but this is his fault. The skill he showed in his previous summer blockbusters is gone. Even though Bay screws up big time, it's not entirely his fault.
While the robot cast is terrific (Peter Cullen should get an Oscar nom for his portrayal of Optimus), most of the human cast is dreadful. Don't get me wrong, I like Shia LaBeouf, but he's really trying too hard in this flick. He stutters half his lines and when he's not doing that, he's just yelling nonsense. As if that's not bad enough, he gets more Razzie help with his annoying parents and an equally annoying roommate. On the contrary, the Transformers girls, Fox and Isabel Lucas, are great additions to this film. For the ladies, there's Josh Duhamel and Tyrese Gibson, but he barely gets any time. And John Tuturro, genius in the first film, is superb, but by the time he hits the screen (about an hour and a half into the film) it's a lost cause.
Even the robots are not safe from error. There's these two annoying robots who are bound to stir up some type of controversy. They are annoying, rude, and unnecessary. In addition, the main villain, the titular Fallen, is introduced, but then forgotten about and not revisited until an hour later. Rest assured, this happens numerous times, which also leads to questions about the length (a crappy 2 1/2 hours) Overall, Transformers 2 was a big, loud mess. As far as robot movies go, Terminator Salvation was much better. Call me what you will, but I did not like it. Everyone I know loved it, but maybe that's another thing. The hype machine was overflowed, so maybe that's why I was disappointed. But who knows? Maybe you're asking the wrong guy. Need proof? While my friends waited for this, I'm just counting the days until Inglourious Basterds comes out. But heed my warning. Don't transform your cash into a ticket for a crappy movie