At least it was better than Armageddon...

Rating: 5/10 (19 September 2010)

...But that's really not saying much. It is, after all, a Michael Bay product.
OK. I finally got around to watching it. I'm not at all a fan of Michael Bay movies but this one was somewhat better than that gag-inducing Armageddon. Actually, the only reason I decided to watch it at all was because I saw that Shia LeBeouf was in it and I liked his work in Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull. Anyway, let's see:
PLUSES:
Shia's work was good in this one
Decent story
(really not necessary to mention this) Great CGI work
Good sound design
MINUSES:
That (or THOSE; it was never really clear)stupid cutesy mini-bots with the Ewok-like vocalizations
Mediocre character development
Unbelievably crappy, bad, cringeworthy dialog - especially the Transformers themselves ("looks like a cool place to KICK IT??" PUH-LEEEZ!!!)
less than impressive acting by several principles most notably Jon Voight and Megen Fox (yeah, she was damn hot but that's not enough)
Some shots - especially a lot of the important CGI action scenes were shot SO CLOSE to the camera I couldn't tell WTF was going on
Michael Bay and his thrice-damned, now severely over used shaky-cam
bad... well I should really say bland and unimpressive score - with one instance of blatant and shameless THEFT of the menacing "bum bum bum bumbump" drum cadence from TERMINATOR (as if we wouldn't notice??)
earsplittingly crappy closing credits noise... uhh I mean "music"
Too long of a run time. Just too too much explosions, crashes, buildings collapsing (all lovingly filmed too close with the aforementioned shaky-cam), etc.
I will say this: I never watched the original cartoon. I never saw the 80s vintage movie. I never owned or played with a Hasbro Xformer toy. This was my very first full exposure to the franchise (probably my last, too, as I was sufficiently unimpressed with this one to feel compelled to watch the sequel).
Oh... I also have to ask: How the hell does a 30 foot-tall, 50 thousand pound bipedal robot turn into a 16 foot long 3000 pound CAR? And if these things could transform, why choose the inefficient shape of a biped if they could convert instead into helicopters or jets carrying similar armament? Why do robots gasp and grunt like WWF wrestlers when they take a blow or fall down????? Are in-line skates the best mode of transportation when chasing an adversary who has taken the shape of a tractor-trailer?
Stupid. Stupid and mindless but more or less entertaining in that turn-your-brain-COMPLETELY-off-and-just-let-it-happen way. I'm very glad I didn't drop $10 to see this in the theater; my computer monitor was sufficient. And one viewing was sufficient, too. This one gets a 55/100 on the ablebravo scorecard.