Painfully Awesome...

Rating: 5/10 (5 July 2007)

After a good movie, you recap the plot, characters, and favorite scenes as a form of "after-entertainment." After watching "Transformers," however, I could only think whether I liked the movie or not. Although I praise the awesome CGI and the fact I was a die-hard for Transformers as a kid, the movie is painfully nostalgic.
"Before time began, there wasthe cube" booms a resounding voice-over of the omniscient Optimus Prime. Oh sure, that means the cube is antimatter. Yet when I tuned into every half hour Transformers animated TV show as a kid, I could care less about the physics of the picture. Michael Bay's "Transformers" has been a success at the popular level because nobody cares to rethink the impossible and ridiculous. I dare not to claim that those who liked his movie are mindless goofs. The movie doesn't deserve to be digested for its plot and meaning; "Transformers" is like a cigarette buzz that you want to last a bit but rewatch with guilt.
With much merit, I liked Bay's "Transformers" because of its sweet CGI work and kinetics of robot battle. The most exciting but brief parts were the swift transformations between vehicle to robot and back, where you can see the dynamics and structures of its individual parts. Yet all the CGI and the pounding sound of twisted metal reminded me of watching football (and probably both more entertaining over several beers) where the entertained gets torn apart while I sit through the ordeal of both teams pushing and pulling over the fifty-yard-line, all in two and a half hours.
In the end, as a long-lost Transformers fan, I go home and dig through my old childhood toys to find my Transformers collection. I feel sorry and I have the urge to cry over them because I miss my childhood, when my mind could not fathom the intricacy of plot, character, and believability of movie adaptations of my once-favorite toy.