What a Mess

Rating: 1/10 (22 July 2007)

OK, I'm not 10 or 14. If I were, maybe TRANSFORMERS would be "awesome" or "a thriller ride." But I'm not. I expect some story, some logic. There is none.
What's good about this movie? A really hot blonde, and an even hotter brunette. And the parents are cute. But that's it.
It is a holy mess of noise and cartoon-like effects from beginning to end. Fine actors like Jon Voight and John Torturro make fools of themselves for a paycheck. Everyone is told to look in awe, all of the time, so everyone is constantly looking up in awe. The black actors are there to tell jokes or curse - nice stereotyping.
If this were a meal, the cook would taste it and then dump it in the trash. Did Bey or Spielberg look at this thing before serving it to us? Barf!