Earth Survives, Ho Hum

Rating: 5/10 (21 July 2007)

It wasn't ever really threatened. In fact, Los Angeles (it was supposedly called something else in the movie) was barely threatened.
When you go to see a "keija" film, especially after seeing the destruction caused by atom bombs, earthquakes, tsunamis, "Godzilla" movies, etc., you expect a "threat" to damage some major real estate. However, the Transformers barely did some low-grade demolition work.
Most of the film (I assume to save money on not so special effects) is spent on a not so enticing "back story" where the characters do one of the worst "misunderstood teens" movies since "The Blob". There is the usual "The military, secret government knew about it all the time" conspiracy and few "explicit" references to teen sex that are typical of modern teen comedies, but, the characters (especially the hero) is completely unengaging and he has no sexual chemistry with the pre-requisite girl friend. All I kept saying was "When do the Xformers start slugging it out over Earth, Democracy, the USA, Los Angeles, their home planet, or whatever the hell was at stake".
Unless you really are from another planet and haven't heard or, nor seen a "Transformer" movie, cartoon, or toy you would be better off skipping this movie.