Amazing special effects cannot totally make up for how disappointing the film is

Rating: 7/10 (19 August 2007)

Despite some of the negative publicity surrounding it, Transformers was one of the most hyped movies of the summer for me. The trailers suggested it was going to be an all out action-orientated blockbuster, and despite the shoddiness of some of the films in Michael Bay's repertoire, I got pretty excited for it. Sadly, it failed to meet all of my expectations, and left a rather sour taste in my mouth that has lasted for the weeks since watching it.
Sam Witwicky (Shia LaBeouf) is in high school, and is desperate to get his own car. He uses eBay and even his own history class to try to hawk off some of his grandfather's prized possessions in the hopes of making the money for it, but seems to be failing on all counts. Eventually, his father Ron (Kevin Dunn) caves, and helps purchase one for him. It runs beautifully, despite some rather strange occurrences in the used car lot, and is just the kind of car Sam has dreamed for. But rather soon after, the car begins to move on its own, and no sooner does Sam realize this when he actually witnesses the car transform into a robot and fight another car turned robot.
This is the basic set-up for Transformers, which merges in elements of government intrigue, blatant Middle East war propaganda, epic CGI action sequences, and rather absurd humour, all revolving around the Autobots (good transformers) centuries old battle with the Decepticons (bad transformers), and both of their races' search for a highly technical piece of rock that just happens to be hiding somewhere on Earth.
Regardless of any fanboy pressure, Bay created the movie he wanted, and it turned out to be a totally convoluted and mixed bag. Looking away from the basics of the story, it seems like the writers and Bay himself tacked on a bit too much in the way of getting the film from point-to-point like any good highly stylized action film attempts to. Scenes with lengthy hacker technical jargon go on far beyond the point they pine for, and scenes where they attempt to go simply for laughs fall flat on their face as near frivolous wastes of time. I rarely see movies that seem to jog around the point for much longer than they should, but for a master of cuts and edits, it seems like Bay just wanted to add in every idea any writer could have ever had for this film, and just make the film a lot more bulky in its running time than it needed to be. It just begs of needing a qualified editor to tell Bay just when enough is. It ruined the near great concept he had in The Island, and it almost ruins everything here.
But the story is really secondary here to the CGI. And does that ever deliver on the promises of the trailers. Every transformer looks sleek and polished, to the point of looking above and beyond realistic. Their interactions with each other, and even human characters is at a level of animation that is rarely seen with mainstream films. Where the likes of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix just has their characters look almost blatantly fake in front of their CGI backgrounds or characters, the animators on Transformers have actually taken the time to make everything look authentic and look real. Half-way through the film you stop thinking these robots do not exist, and start wondering how long it is going to take before you actually see one up close and personal. And that is just looking at them walking around, the scenes with them in battle between each other are even better (even with them being highly stylized edit-wise).
The voice acting is all top notch, across the board (I particularly dug the ever reliable Peter Cullen as Optimus Prime yet again, and Hugo Weaving as Megatron). The real actors acting is not as great. LaBeouf does his best to support the robots, and pulls off a fairly decent performance. We have obviously seen him in much stronger roles demanding much more of his acting capabilities, but for the little amount of real acting he has to do here (which does not include the running, screaming or genuine awe at what is going on in front of him), he does pretty adequately. His mandatory love interest, Mikaela (Megan Fox), does about as much as her gorgeous one-dimensional character needs to. The rest of the supporting cast, rounded out by Josh Duhamel, Tyrese Gibson, Rachael Taylor, Anthony Anderson, John Turturro (in his most uselessly over-the-top performance ever) and Jon Voight, all do sufficiently enough, but like all the supporting characters in Bay films, basically serve the function of helping the film move from beginning to middle to end (and of course, help explain the jargon being employed by the extras).
But while the film may have its follies, what truly destroys the foundations it successfully employs, is the deliberate product placements scattered throughout the movie. Unlike the cartoon versions of Transformers, almost every single car is a brand name one. Mentions of eBay literally fly through character's mouths, and there's even a whole two minute long conversation about how great Nokia is. I understand the need for product placement, but when the film dwindles on these symbols for more than a mere second, it just shows me how unashamed these filmmakers were in creating this film. If I wanted to see an advertisement for cars, phones, Burger King and Mountain Dew, I would sit through a television commercial or read a magazine.
It disgusted me to see just how far Bay and company milked the placements, and to me, stands as the one true killer of everything that Transformers has going for it. Yes, it is a fairly good action film with some amazing effects, but at the price of being one huge commercial.
7/10.