so sad...

Rating: 4/10 (24 September 2007)

As a kid I was totally hooked on those mystery robots that can transform and fight their epic war. I owned at least 20 Transformers, always watched the animated series and just couldn't wait to see them on a "real" screen.
The more I hoped, the more I got disappointed. In fact, my friend had to keep me on the seat during movie because several times I was about to get up and leave the theater. Why? In fact very simple...
Maybe I was looking for that old Transformer feeling I had when I was a kid. Well, it didn't come back at ANY point of the movie. Instead I got sprinkled with a film without any logic, intelligence nor uniqueness. People told me that this is the next barrier of film, no, it isn't. It shows very well how you can damage a great story with a redirection of the cash flow of the makers. Here ALL the money flowed into special FX, full stop. The cast is exceptionally dull, shallow and underdeveloped. The script is so cheesy that a 10 year old could have written it (maybe that's the target audience but how is a ten year old supposed to get nostalgic on this one?).
Some excerpts of what I found "head shakingly" stupid:

Robots that talk in Ghetto slang

A secret service that is so secret, not even the state knows about it

Soldiers that shoot shoot shoot and just don't seem to notice that their actions have no effect

The whole arsenal of the US military is "shown off"!

Robots trying to "hide" from the target's parents and behaving like amateurs.

The "character" of the little evil spybot is just too similar to the spiders in "Eight Legged Freaks", making noises like a baby.

The people behave like in Jerry Zucker movies: stupid, illogical, immature, ...

If you have seen Bad Boys 2 or The Island you will notice extremely strong similarities considering the action. Actually it's just a repeat.

Why do you always have a clear look at Megan's tanned breasts?

When the movie was finished I was close to crying. I felt like I was robbed of any feeling or nostalgia that I had about the "Transformers". I decided to erase this movie out of my memory though it has done a lot of damage already. I gave it five points because it looks expensive, of course the action is well filmed (although edited a little too fast at some points), the robots move really convincing and the impacts they have on the environments also appear very real. Still, it just doesn't help the film to be enjoyable... Hollywood, what have you become?