"NEEK!"

Rating: 10/10 (21 July 2002)

Top Secret is undoubtedly one of THE funniest films ever made. It is chock full of one-liners and sight gags that come fast and furious. So much so, that I'm sure some viewers will miss things the first time around.
Val Kilmer is indeed underrated: the guy can act, sing, and dance! You don't see many actors these days that are that well trained in the film industry. How many of you were smart enough to buy the five-track vinyl EP of Val singing the songs from Top Secret all those years ago? It's one of my most prized possessions. When listening to Nick Rivers sing you too will scream "NEEK!"
The spoofs of Elvis and spy movies are the main focus, but you'll be treated to plenty more references from The Wizard Of Oz to The Blue Lagoon, and everything is interwoven with brilliance. After all, in what universe or time did this East Germany exist? This concept for Top Secret is so bizarre and I think it just can't be topped. The cheesy pizzas at Der Pizza Haus had me laughing so hard I was crying. Undoubtedly it would receive a PG-13 if released today, this film had a lot of great adult humor in it for a PG. I was gasping and laughing so hard at the introduction of the Anal Intruder product -- as with that scene, everything was played so sincerely that you just couldn't believe what you were seeing. Of course, the Swedish bookshop has to be considered one of the funniest, most clever, and complicated sequences in film history. Frankly, I enjoy this film a lot more than Airplane (a classic too of course), as it touches on things that I relate to more. Yes, I GOT the Pinto joke....our family owned one of those cars. Speaking of cars, seeing Omar Sharif crunched up in a car cube was astonishing! There's so much attention to detail in EVERY frame of this film, down to even the choice of backing singers for Nick Rivers when he performs. Simply amazing.
There's no need for me to go on and on about this film, as I'm sure many have read all there is to know about the plot and what people consider the funniest moments. I primarily wanted to get my two cents worth in and say that Top Secret is a true classic, deserves a lot more respect, and maybe Paramount will some day put out a MORE special edition of the DVD than the one that's available now -- this is the one movie I have been waiting for on DVD more than any other besides the release of Eraserhead in 2002.
Top Secret is a real treat and will have you singing "Skeet Surfin'" for days! Say, where can I get one of those giant telephones?