"You're gonna need a bigger boat". (see Jaws infra)

Rating: 7/10 (24 December 2000)

It's almost too easy to bash this film. So I'll just paraphrase what James Cameron himself said on TV one night about the "pitch" meeting for the film..."I got an idea for a film about a boat. It's about 3 hours long and nothing much is gonna happen for about 2 1/2 hours. Then everbody dies and there's no chance for a sequel. And by the way..it's gonna cost you about $200 million to make it. Whaddya think, guys?"
Truth be told..the first half hour or so (the Bill Pullman stuff with actual footage) ain't bad, but nothing I haven't already seen on the Discovery Channel.
I'll still take Cameron's "The Abyss" every day and twice on Sunday. The guy directs a pretty neat little action film. It's just that I like my disposable love stories served with a side order of humor..and maybe some actual "acting". You know. The stuff that actors do in movies? In "The Abyss", Ed Harris and the gang got into their characters enough to give the movie a nice kick. Leo and Co. are reduced to playing second fiddle to blue screen effects.
And here's another shining moment for the Oscars. Ranks right up there with the Milli Vanilli Grammy Award in the "What the hell were they thinking, anyway?" category.