You bunch of Party Poopers.

Rating: 10/10 (12 January 1999)

Okay, I've been on both sides of the fence. I saw the movie. I loved the movie. Are you kidding?? I was sobbing from the moment the orchestra started playing "Nearer my God to thee." (Of course, my friend should not have taken me to see it in an attempt to cheer me up...) Then I got caught up in the trend of dogging the movie. "Oh it has an awful screenplay." "Oh, Kate Winslet and DiCaprio can't act." "Oh, the story is so contrived." "Oh, the movie is too long." "Oh, gawd, if I have to listen to Celine Dion sing 'My Heart Will Go On' one more time I'm going to bash my radio against the wall."
And then I saw it again and got my head on straight. Okay, so the love story is cheesy. ALL LOVE STORIES ARE CHEESY. Otherwise they wouldn't be so goddamned interesting. Next time you fall in love see how intellectual you behave. Yes Celine Dion is awful, but the song is gorgeous when orchestrated (and probably would be if Celine Dion weren't singing it). My only problem with the special effects is that they cost too damned much but let's be realistic - if the people doing them were doing it for the love of computer animation instead of for sucking millions out of Hollywood, it wouldn't have. All the roles are fine for the purposes they served. The Asshole, the mean mother, the lost lover . . . Trust me, it's no cheesier than another great love story I can think of. Do you recognize this one? Boy meets girl at Party. Boy has to marry girl the next day or else, despite the fact that she is from the family of a sworn enemy. Girl agrees. Boy kills girl's Cousin. Oops, he just violated the local ruler's decree, he must now be exiled. Girl feigns death to avoid distasteful marriage. Boy hears girl is dead, kills himself. Girl hears boy is dead, kills herself. Families reconcile. All in the space of four days. And yet everyone loves this story. Yes I'm talking about Romeo and Juliet. I repeat, ALL LOVE STORIES ARE CHEESY. So why does everyone mind that this one is too?
Get real, rent the video or order it on Pay-per-View, see it without the gaggle of heckling friends you went to see it with before. Or if you haven't seen it, goodness me, how can you expect the rest of us to respect your position on the movie IF YOU HAVEN"T EVEN SEEN IT? Come on! Don't believe the hype either way. Just see the movie and then keep your opinion to yourself. It's been a year already, and there are other movies out there. Sheesh.