The only entertaining thing about this movie is the seasickness it will induce.

Rating: 2/10 (11 October 2006)

Pure glop. Wooden acting. Astonishingly unconvincing characters. Boring, generic music (descending to banality in the case of "My Heart Will Go On"). Good sets and effects (no surprise, considering how much money was spent on them). Overall, the cinematic equivalent of a Big Mac, but even more tasteless.
The first time I watched "Titanic," I lasted 20 minutes. "I'm going upstairs to read," I told my wife. "Call me when it starts to sink." The sinking was lots of fun (that, and the effects, are why I rate it a 2 instead of a 1), but not enough to counteract three hours of turgid, sentimental ooze. If the film had BEGUN with the sinking scene, it would rate a 10.
I did watch it again, in its entirety, and that's three and a quarter hours of my life that I will never get back.