4/10 dogs big enough to ride

Rating: 4/10 (15 May 2020)

The movie's best moments are its comedy. Everything else just does not really work for me. I can't take the more serious fantasy elements as seriously as the movie clearly wants me to. Everything that happens in this movie feels like it happens way too fast for beings whose lifespans are approximately 5000 years, yet it also feels like nothing actually happens in the movie? People joke about how forgettable the sidekicks are, and they're not wrong. Also Thor and Loki's wigs are not good, and Thor's eyebrows are the worst. And so. many. Dutch. angles. why.
Hawkeye, whom I love, gets the absolute worst cameo in what is probably the best scene in the movie.
It's not all bad. It is always nice to see more Coulson. Seeing people on the opposite end of S.H.I.E.L.D.'s actions was a clever choice. I really like the Destroyer's design. It is also the first installment in the ongoing Thor Smushes His Face Into Glass saga. Seriously, if you haven't picked up on this yet, he does this in every movie he's in.
Odin is the second Marvel Bad Dad™ in a long list of them.