Boy Gets Hammer, Loses Hammer, & Then Gets Hammer Back Saga

Rating: 5/10 (20 May 2011)

Although the newest addition to the Marvel Comics' cinematic super hero pantheon boasts polished production values and a charismatic cast, "Hamlet" director Kenneth Branagh's "Thor" qualifies as business as usual. This preposterous, larger-than-life, 115-minute, PG-13 rated opus shifts scenes between contemporary New Mexico and the fabled realm of Asgard where Norse royalty reside in opulent splendor. "Agent Cody Banks" scenarists Ashley Edward Miller & Zack Stentz along with "Fantastic 4: Rise of the Silver Surfer" scribe Don Payne gave "Thor" their best shot based on a story by "Ninja Assassin" scenarist J. Michael Straczynski and "Poseidon" writer Mark Protosevich. Despite those best efforts, "Thor" amounts to a standard-issue 'origins' epic about Odin's arrogant offspring. No surprises lurk in this predictable, but sometimes amusing epic about the hammer wielding Norse champion. Basically, "Thor" boils down to a boy-gets-hammer, boy-loses-hammer, and boy-gets-hammer back adventure. During this lukewarm lark, our hero acquaints himself with the meaning of humility after his stern father Odin (Anthony Hopkins) has banished him from his own celestial kingdom. Handsome Aussie stud Chris Hemsworth, cast as Captain Kirk's father in the "Star Trek" reboot, provides the appropriate brawn and blond hair as the eponymous hero afflicted with anger management issues. Mind you, the real Thor of lore possessed red hair and a red beard. Meantime, Academy Award winning actress Natalie Portman, Kat Dennings, and Stellan Skarsgård enliven the Earth scenes, while Oscar-winner Anthony Hopkins lords it over the Asgard scenes as the one-eyed Odin. Eventually, Thor and leading lady Jane gravitate to each other, but the film dwells on family woes more than romantic woo.
"Thor" opens in Puente Antiguo, New Mexico. Astrophysicist Jane Foster (Natalie Portman of "Black Swan"), her mentor Dr. Erik Selvig (Stellan Skarsgård of "Good Will Hunting"), and their wiseacre assistant Darcy Lewis (Kat Dennings of "Defendor") are in the middle of nowhere at night searching for an atmospheric anomaly. Foster collides with somebody when they plunge into a storm-like phenomena. Before we discover who they've struck, the plot propels us back in time to Norway in 965 A.D. Odin has triumphed over the evil Frost Giants, led by King Laufey (Colm Feore of "Chicago"), in a war to thwart them from conquering Earth. Odin loses an eye and exiles these icy blue bastards to their frozen world of Jotunheim. Furthermore, Odin confiscates the Casket of Ancient Winters that serves as their source of power. Later, as Odin is about to crown Thor, some Frost Giants infiltrate Asgard and try to recover the casket. Although Odin dismisses the attempt as a botched effort, Thor wants to wage war on the Frost Giants. Odin and he resort to name-calling, and then Thor with his brother Loki (Tom Hiddleston of "Midnight in Paris") and a quartet of his warrior comrades storm Jotunheim. When Odin learns about Thor's insubordination, he banishes his son to Earth. Thor is hurled into a "Stargate" wormhole and hits planet Earth about the same time that Jane slams into him with her vehicle.
As superhero movies go, nobody is ever in genuine jeopardy. The combat scenes generate little tension or suspense. Sure, several characters have some close scrapes with death, but nobody dies. Worse, some characters can get away with more than others because Branagh and his writers don't make us privy to their special powers. Watch Loki and you'll see. As villains rate, Loki doesn't amount to much more than a trickster, and Thor never performs anything incredibly cool, like the heroes in "Iron Man," "The Incredible Hulk," and "The Fantastic Four." Specifically, the villains don't pose much of a threat to Jane and her friends.
The chief problem with "Thor" is the less-than-gripping scripting. If you're a fan of the original Marvel Comics "Thor" from 1962, the Ashley Edward Miller, Zack Stentz and Don Payne version shares little in common with "Journey into Mystery" #83. Donald Blake is mentioned a few times in the film. In the comic book, Blake discovered a wooden staff. When he smashed it against a rock, the staff became 'Mjolnir.' Miller, Stentz, and Payne dispense with the usual human who masquerades as a superhero, and pick up the thread of the "Thor" comics from later incarnations. Unlike most Marvel Comics where the hero suffers from a fatal flaw, Thor has nothing comparable outside of his anger management issues. Once he finds himself separated from his supernatural hammer, he calms down enough to get it back, but he doesn't have to endure much suffering until then.
Anybody who can catch "Thor" in 2-D will enjoy the experience much more than the 3-D version. As it turns out, "Thor" was photographed in 2-D and then converted to 3-D. Not once do you see Thor hurl his celebrated hammer 'Mjolnir' at the camera. Indeed, nothing in the 3-D "Thor" flies out at you. More fly-in-your face gimmicks would have bolstered the action quotient of this lackluster effort. Nevertheless, the other special effects are beyond reproach. The otherworldly utopia that constitutes Asgard is a mixture of "Men-in-Black" production designer Bo Welch, "Sleuth" costume designer Alexandra Byrne and "Mamma Mia!" lenser Haris Zambarloukos. Asgard is a visual treat if you like edifices that resemble organ pipes. The African-American sentry guarding the Bifrost, Heimdall (Idris Elba of "Takers"), seems a little incongruous, but then we live in politically enlightened times. The same holds true for one of Thor's best buddies, Hogun (Japanese actor Tadanobu Asano), who is clearly Asian. Marvel movie fans will be happy to know S.H.I.E.L.D's Agent Coulson (Clark Gregg) from the "Iron Man" films reprises his role. Natalie Portman has little to do but slam her vehicle into our hero. The best parts of "Thor" take place on Earth and the fish-out-of-water story with Thor tangling with modern-day life provides the primary source of comic relief.
Altogether, "Thor" could have been more.