THERE'S SOMETHING ABOUT PACE

Rating: Null/10 (24 August 1999)

There's Something About Mary has one of the best trailers I've seen. As a film, however, it stinks. TSAM rates as possibly the sloppiest piece of light-comedy movie I've seen since I last rented a(ny) Chevy Chase film. A knockabout comedy that clocks in at around 2 hours? The alarm bells were sounding, but still I bought a ticket expecting a silly but mirthful afternoon in the local Odeon... What you get is 5 distinct set-piece gags that are deadeningly sign-posted 10 minutes before they detonate, and rely for their humour on you having spent isolated months in a Tibetan Media Retreat for the Terminally Over-Appealed-To. God, this film was bad. Don't these directors understand that comedy has to be rooted in reality to be funny? No. Instead of clever plotting and characterisation you get scenes that might as well bear the gurning subtitles "This bit is incredibly funny! Tell your friends! ITS FUNNY ISN'T IT!". A wearing 120 minutes. I thought I'd lost all feeling in my legs by the time it limped to the denouement. Needless to say the kiss at the end was an all time cinema low. 'Make it Stop!' shrieked my inner monologue.
I fully anticipate 'Theres Something Else About Mary' and 'More Mary: the Quickening'. Fortunately my video is on the blink so I won't be able to rent these straight to BlockBuster features. Remember to check your brain in at the cloakroom.