Gahbage

Rating: 1/10 (17 April 2016)

The Witch is a period piece in Horror disguise. There was no suspense, no tension, no fear, no nothing. It had so much nothing that there wasn't even any color. People call it a "slow burner" but in reality, it just fizzles out. A movie that relies on dialogue should make more of an effort to have said dialogue understandable. Maybe if I knew what they were saying more than 50% of the time it might be a better film. Even when you could tell they were speaking English, the mumbling was hard to get past. The whole movie is spent waiting for the end because it felt like it was building to something but that something never came. Awful movie was awfully boring. Gahbage.