Stinking heap of love story masquerading as a horror movie

Rating: Null/10 (1 September 2004)

Who hasn't seen the ads for this new horror movie getting flashed around the TV? The ads looked pretty good; the trailer was cool and the movie...
I: Let the bad colour not be seen. It attracts them.
II: Never enter the woods. That is where they wait.
III: Heed the warning bell, for they are coming.
Well it was completely in the wrong category; here we have a love story that just happens to have a few scary moments, very few in fact. Although if they had advertised it as a love story I'm seriously doubting many would have wasted money to see it. The plot falls in a hole sometime around the start, finds some traction later on but fails to ever really fire.
Joaquin Phoenix is a great actor but the script is well below his abilities and does him no credit at all â' Why can't I take my eyes of those funky pants he has!? Bryce Dallas Howard manages the worst performance of a blind person I have seen since my, then nine year old, brother pretended he was blind. Sigourney Weaver failed to do anything but add credence to the fact that she has had her time and the mantle needs to be passed, someone put her out to pasture please.
The only stand out actor in it all was Adrien Body, who I can only recall from The Thin Red Line, although he has an extensive list of acting credits to his name â' His performance was great and while watching this drivel, he was the only believable character in the entire film.
Save your money and catch it on television in a couple of years, you won't regret it.