Hurting myself

Rating: 1/10 (21 March 2010)

How to describe the appalling mess that is this thing- "Film" for what it's worth? Ugly cannot cover it. If there is such thing as 'make-up' sex there also needs to be 'cleanse my memory' sex. And I need it now. Is there such a thing as a hate-gasm? I have enjoyed sex regularly for quite some time but this film may have killed my libido forever. We had a drinking game designed especially for this film; take a shot every time we felt violated or if someone within the film jumped up and down in obviously fake joy. We are f****ing RAT-AS**D. Why are there no negative stars? Why can I not rate into imaginary numbers? We are moving out of California because we are convinced that Jesus is going to smite down upon the entire state because of this unfunny, poorly conceived, piece of filth.