If you weren't depressed before watching this, you'll be after wards.

Rating: 4/10 (10 December 2014)

New Moon is two hours of watching a teenager cry over her bipolar vampire boyfriend break-up. She lays in her bed while ignoring her caring father, develops some kind of eating disorder and eventually becomes suicidal. She also attempts to get herself gang-banged by a bunch of bikers and friendzones a hot, muscular guy that walks around topless almost the ENTIRE movie. I seriously don't get why she doesn't do him once. I would. When she actually starts liking the shirtless wolf guy (which takes almost the whole movie), her vampire ex ruins it by suddenly deciding that he wants to kill himself by exposing his glittery blingbody to all of mankind. THE END.