On Getting Dumped Without Explanation

Rating: 7/10 (11 December 2014)

Disclaimer. I am a 66 year old gay male, not the intended target for this movie. I probably reacted to it in a different way than the average viewer will.
Twilight The Saga: New Moon is a much darker movie than Twilight I.
For many people, myself included, being dumped by a lover who you madly adored, unexpectedly, without explanation is by far the worst event of your life. This happens to Bella Swan. Usually, a movie would gloss over this bleakness in a few seconds of clichés. But Twilight sits on it for almost the whole movie, and explores the pain with some imagination. It also explores not wanting ever to be involved again, and forever holding back. It explores the way you hold onto the flimsiest shred of hope your true love will eventually come back and the imaginary conversations. It even tackles suicide. It may be a downer, but everyone who has been through this will identify.
Often on-screen are a number of similar-looking, rain-soaked, muscular, shirtless young men who have the annoying habit of transforming into CGI wolves, followed by stock footage of CGI wolves fighting. These scenes could just as well have been realistic animations of suburban dogfights over unspayed females for all their originality.
Taylor Lautner, who plays Jacob Black, has an astounding body with an eye-popping perfection that reminded be of Arnold Schwarzenegger in Terminator I, though not as bulky. Lautner has a heart-meltingly handsome face. He is as lovable as a puppy, but he is too wooden. When he recites his lines in his urban nasal voice, I think of some awkward kid in a school play. It is like he does not believe what he is saying. He is just reading the lines. Further, his character is a bit like L'il Abner compared with the tortured complex Edward Cullen, so he is intrinsically not anywhere near as interesting. Joseph's shtick is being considerate, kind and gentle one minute and a rageoholic the next, like the Incredible Hulk, a cautionary tale for those who are attracted to the type.
Bella often gets herself in trouble, but not with the nail-biting relentlessness of the first movie. The adrenalin level of this movie is much lower. It is more about heart-sickness than danger.
The most amusing line in the movie, is from vampire, Alice Cullen, played by Ashley Green, about Bella "I have never met anyone so prone to life-threatening idiocy", as aside to the audience acknowledging the rather strained plot to keep Bella in predicaments.
Like the original movie, it drifts back and forth between reality, magic realism and dream deliberately confusing you.
The happy ending is so cruel. It will deceive so many into thinking if they but put their life on hold yet another decade, their heart's desire will be fulfilled.
The most irritating feature of the movie: Bella drove me nuts with her juvenile concern with her relationship with Edward lasting forever and selfishly ignoring nurturing her relationships today.