Well.....It was not boring :)

Rating: 4/10 (25 April 2011)

To be honest I hate Twilight, I hate its message and I hate how it has butchered works of horror literature, and harlequin romance.Surprisingly I found this movie evocative (all negative emotions though), and that makes it a better movie than "Knight and Day"
The Plot: Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson) leaves to confront the Valturi (an elite clan of vampires),leaving Bella Swan (Kirsten Stewart) in a depressed state , to be only comforted by her long time friend Jacob (Taylor Lautner).
The Writing: The plot itself is intriguing, and by itself pretty good. The drama of choice between two different men, and Edwards love toward Bella stems from his inability to read her mind. This obviously means they can actually have passion in their relationship (due to him being unable to read her innermost thoughts). However the characters (or just Bella and Edward) prohibit this reasonable plot to shine through. The symbolism presented in this movie is also so very ham fisted it makes the allegory of homosexuality in X-men seem subtle. I of course refer to the were-wolves (which are more like just wolves, since they are not bipedal), a group of shirtless teenagers who enjoy playing "physical jousting" with each other and have no choice of them having this ability. This is especially prevalent when Bella tells Jacob that "what you are doing is wrong" and "stop it", Jacob retorts "Its not like I have a choice", "I was born this way". This sort of symbolism is so blunt it made teenagers being rejected by society wearing brightly colored leather, with "special powers" seem vague. Bella as character is just pure evil, in lamence term; She is a parasite. She is unable to live without a man, and the actions she commits to keep a man is beyond compulsive. She basically tortures Jacob to be with her, always giving him hope that they may be together, when she obviously loves Edward. The plot itself also seems to support this as every instance that they are able to physically bond (a kiss) a extraneousness circumstance seems to stop them doing so (this happens three times).Edward comes of as un- relatable to me due to the fact I am not a masochist. I do not see why she cannot change Bella into a vampire and forgo all the drama that is this redundant series. Jacob and the father seem to be the only characters that I can support, they are kind, (very)patient , and are flawed, however they are the biggest doormats and have to learn to say no to Bella for this movie to have a remotely good script.The script also completely destroyed vampires allowing them to walk in day light and werewolves being able to change at will. Those are minor complaints that are over used, but still bugged me. The movie was also to long being 130minutes ,making the development between Bella and Jacob become padding rather than character development. 2/5
The acting: Asides Kirsten Stewart and Robert Pattinson everyone turns out a reasonable performance, the extras are able convey their grief, joy and anger with consistence. However the two leads are consistent to the point of ossification, they never convey a single emotion asides non-chalance. I can sort of let Edward go with this since he is a conflicted character due to his masochistic nature,but there is no excuse why Kirsten Stewart cannot show emotions (I mean she did that quite well in Adventureland). 3/5
The cinematography: Is average, the lighting is good showing the crisp natural colours of the forest quite well and giving some beautiful vistas of said forest.However there was an overuse of slow motion (that was just inappropriate and jarring), and I am still baffled about the sparkling vampires. I mean they do not just sparkle, to me it looked like they had a disco ball under their pores shooting out strobe lights. 3/5
The score: Just bad the music did not fit in with the fight scenes, and most of the songs played are songs of lament, that would sounds fitting for the plot but on execution just does not work at all. The lazy and sad voices of the bands playing do not fit with the calm soothing imagery provided by the forests that take up most of the movie. 1/5
I cannot give this movie a recommendation by its own merits, however I did find it entertaining as all these mistakes made me laugh quite a bit. I found this movie much more funnier than the parody "movies" that have been streaming out these days and on that merit it is worth a rental. Serious score : 4.5/10 As a comedy : 7/10