What a Horror Movie Should Be

Rating: 10/10 (25 October 2005)

Remakes today are seemingly ubiquitous in Hollywood. Most of them are unnecessary (e.g. Alfie), or unwarranted (e.g. Dawn of the Dead), and damned near every single one is crap. But there is always the exception to the rule: John Carpenter's The Thing is the exception to the Iron Law of Remakes. It goes off in a different direction than Howard Hawks' Thing (which is trite "Doctor, look at the geiger counter!" 1950s rubbish), but stays more faithful to the original source material. This film is a horror masterpiece, without flaws, false notes, or counterfeit nonsense that makes the viewer say to himself "Oh yeah, I'm watchin' a movie." The script is taut, the acting superb, the credibility factor unassailable, and the special effects tremendous. I don't think Hollywood realizes just how artificial and awful CGI is. The effects in The Thing are gross, gory, and organic, and they never made me shake my head once. Let's put it this way: the 1982 special effects for The Thing do the job they're supposed to do--tell the story--better than anything George Lucas and his oodles of nerd-loot managed twenty years later. This is a film to own, and I can't sing its praises enough. Last point: I've seen the movie numerous times, and know how the plot works out...but the film is so well-made, such a classic, that I'll stick with it if I chance upon it on cable because it's that good (cf. "The Godfather).