Pompous, Incoherent, Horrible Waste of $8 and 3 hours

Rating: Null/10 (22 January 1999)

As I see it, the only element of this movie that could be considered even remotely redeeming is the beautiful cinematography; but that being said, I must quickly add that if I ever had to watch The Thin Red Line again, it would have to be with the sound turned off. And in a way, this visual impressiveness makes the crime that The Thin Red Line commits against the movie-going public even more heinous: just think of what we have been deprived of by placing such an obviously huge budget in the hands of its inept creators.
What a steaming pile. At the end of three long, torturous hours, I was left bewildered, disappointed, and downright insulted. The only reason I didn't walk out in the middle of this almost unbearable movie was that I refused to believe that it was actually as trite and predictable as it seemed and then proved itself to be. The three-hour beating my head suffered from the endless stream of obvious, insipid metaphors crammed sloppily into this pompous movie left me in physical pain. The Thin Red Line, with all of its lofty intentions, fell hard and flat on its pretty face.
Tragically, anyone who saw the trailers will (understandably) refuse to believe me. How could so many good actors and such an interesting subject be so completely and utterly wasted? Well, only Mr. Malick can answer that one. It certainly baffles me.