Lemme Break this on down.

Rating: Null/10 (24 October 2002)

Jeez, I went and saw the ring the other day, and I gotta tell you, I was pretty impressed with it. It is one of the very few enjoyable horror films I have seen in the last several months, and I think this is due to a couple of different reasons.
First of all, I have never seen the original movie. I genuinely want to, but haven't had the opportunity to do so yet. Also, I really, really want to enjoy horror movies. Call me retarded, but I'm keeping the faith that sooner or later, really good horror movies are going to get made again.
There are a couple things, however, that I would like to bring up before letting The Ring go without suffering at least a little bit of my wrath. First of all, the beginning, with the two school girls talking about the tape, was utter crap. Now, I'm not sure if this scene was a part of the original, but if it was, I hope it was executed a little better than it was here. It all seemed a bit too "I know what you did last summer" for me. Which brings me to my next point.
If I were Gore Verbinski, and I were directing this movie, I would make DAMN Sure that Ehren Kruger's name was nowhere near it! Not to take away from Ehren Krugers ability as a writer, because I'm sure it's formidable, but wasn't this the person that wrote Scream 3? If you ask me, there is a certain stigma attached to the scream movies that makes me want to run away screaming from anyone involved. When I drop my hard earned wompum down on the theater counter, I want to know that I am supporting TRUE horror, not sappy, bubble gummy, I still know what I caught you doing last summer, horror. If the Scream movies were a living breathing entity, that could be reckoned with, I would wait until it was taking a crap and shank it with a homemade knife. That would be a crime worth doing time over. Imagine the respect I would get in prison!
Guard: Hey, have you seen the new guy?
Guard 2: Yeah I heard he killed scream!
Prisoners United: HOOORAY!!!
I would have more ho's than Suge Night!