Talking Metaphors

Rating: 2/10 (21 May 2009)

Naomi Watts has never been as pallid as in this one, but her performance must be considered Oscar fare when compared to the cretinous script penned by Ehren "Scream III" Kruger -- "The Ring" is nothing but a great big mess, a piece of junk masqueraded as a horror movie. A curse on a VHS tape, an evil essence infused into electronics, a disturbed child mumbling and grumbling, everything adds up to an overblown mystery leading consequently and literally into a deep well ... a fitting metaphor for the yawning black (plot)hole(s) swallowing director Verbinsky's useless efforts of creating anything coherent, logical or scary out of this soulless teen scam. And if you'd watch this movie a thousand times, it still wouldn't make any sense. My two stars are probably the result of this bright early summer day. But come to think of "The Ring" again: Make them a one.