Hey! I can yawn, fast-forward, and chew bubble gum at the same time!

Rating: Null/10 (22 March 2003)

I agree with the sentiment of one reviewer who basically said "Lynch can get away with nonsensical weirdness, Verbinski. You can't."
As I age it occurs to me that Hollywood's tricks don't work on me as well as they used to. Well, sometimes they do. Depends on the execution. I like Naomi Watts straight away, but even her comely presence failed to save this atmospheric mess from my fast-forwarding trigger-happy finger.
Since no one seems to know what this film is about, I won't try to explain what I don't know about it either. I do know that it reminds me of "Signs" in its popularity and its ridiculousness.