Fancy cinematography concealing a conventional story.

Rating: 6/10 (14 January 2016)

What kind of movie is this? Under all the grim yet starkly beautiful exterior scenery, there is a conventional story. Although the story is set in the western US of the 1830s, which at the time was wilderness, the movie plays more like an action comic. The main character is indestructible and his nemesis, named Fitzgerald, played by Tom Hardy, comparably sinister (although far less intelligent). Nothing kills the main character, whose name is Glass, played by Leonardo De Caprio. He's shot, mauled, stabbed, starved, frozen, beaten, buried alive, caroms over waterfalls, and lives. And if that isn't enough, he is also cajoled, belittled, humiliated, and mocked without lapsing into despair. This is stretching literary license to the limit. It also takes away whatever suspense there may be as to how the story will end. If an enraged grizzly bear and aggressive Native Americans can't kill him, you know that the bad guy doesn't have a chance. It's just a matter of time. So, the ending of the movie is a foregone conclusion. De Caprio is good as Glass, the man with a mission. He is a metaphor for suffering and self-righteous anger. (Why he is angry will not be revealed here. For that, watch the movie.) This movie shows to what lengths a person will go to survive, at least according to Hollywood. The problem is: we know Glass is going to survive. Regarding Tom Hardy's performance as Fitzgerald, it's part John Wayne doing Rooster Cogburn, part Jeff Bridges doing Roy Pulsipher from R.I.P.D., with a dose of Foghorn Leghorn filling in the rest, except nastier and dumber (even dumber than Mr. Leghorn). There's no way that a dullard like Fitzgerald is going to fool anyone as to his nefarious purposes. He would have done better if he had just worn a sign saying "I am a bad guy." Now, the movie does offer some useful tips on how to survive in the wild. 1. According to the movie, if you happen to be stuck in the middle of nowhere with a dead horse, that horse could still save your life. To find out how, watch the movie. (hint: you must be familiar with a horse's internal anatomy) 2. Never shoot an enraged grizzly bear, stab it instead. (Apparently, for some reason, the movie maker believes that a bullet is less effective than a knife as a weapon.) 3. Never deny a Native American's request for a horse. It could lead to serious problems. (But problems can be avoided if you are willing to trade for a woman.) These are just a few of the many things this movie teaches on how to survive in the wild. Thus, the movie provides a useful public service.