Pretentious Nonsense

Rating: 4/10 (23 December 2015)

Forget the hype likely brought to you by those who think the Batman films are high art with religious overtones.
This is a silly, over the top, confused, ugly slog that is often laughable. The opus opens with dimwitted trappers in the Rocky Mountains, circa 1820 or so, being attacked by Indians. Rather than take shelter or even lay down to fire back at the arrow shooting Indians, the trappers mill around offering good targets for said Indians who pick off maybe half of their number. The trappers decide to split the scene after a bit and that's that with that for a while.
Along the way home, one of their number gets attacked by a remarkably ineffective grizzly bear. Now the bear has an open season on this guy, bites him a dozen times, mauls him repeatedly yet doesn't kill him which should get the bear the ursine Oscar for the worst performance by a bear in a supporting role.
The boys face a confused crisis - do the trappers stay around waiting for the guy to recover or continue to flee a bunch of lackadaisical Indians who may be vaguely sauntering after them at a leisurely pace? They split the difference delegating a subcommittee to hang out while the majority flee. When the subcommittee withdraws from their nursing duties, the mauled guy gives chase.
So here's a guy who should be dead but he endures more on his trek back than most hale and hearty humans can take. I won't list them all but check this one out. He flees some Indians who may be the the attackers or maybe not (there are many factions none of which are clear) by taking a long swim in a partly frozen river. Huh?
The passengers who hit the water at the Titanic sinking lasted maybe 45 seconds. In water of similar temperatures, this half dead baby faced actor lasts hours emerging no worse for wear. Well, why not. Anybody who can stand up to a sustained grizzly bear attack must view a few hours swim in near frozen water nothing more than refreshing.
Along the way he manages to steal the world's first and maybe only repeating flintlock pistol. These smooth-bore arms are universally tack driving accurate. One guy uses his musket to pick off a rider over 200 m away while our baby faced frozen trapper has no trouble making a 50 m offhanded shot from his galloping horse hitting a rider on another galloping horse. Camp Petty calls these guys.
In the end, the thing wraps up with more Indians wandering on set to fulfill a prophecy of baby face's now dead wife and although he gets stabbed a few more times, he remains doing just ducky.
Grim, confused, miserable and at parts laughable - today's high art.