Come On, Man, You can Do Better Than This!

Rating: 5/10 (22 April 2017)

An empty retro-actioner plotted to the gills and absent of memorable characterization. Gosling and Crowe do their best (subtracting one painful Lou Costello imitation) but are reduced to pantomiming chemistry-lacking oddballs, characters we'd be embarrassed to watch in the 1980s.
Maybe Shane Black wanted "Scarecrow" meets "The Last Boy Scout", crossed with an edgy episode of "One Day At a Time". But the $50 million to transform Atlanta into 1977 L.A. doesn't apologize for the zero behavioral comedy rewards, the very UN-70s choreographed and over-Foley'ed violence, and the director's signature: an annoying teenage girl. Here, providing more edge to the porno jokes. The movie just belches songs and sedans as if the costume and art departments never bothered to absorb a 70s movie, to see how they feel. The looks are just window dressing, with a few fun details. Like watching a teenager get thrown through a window. Luckily the wigs and facial hair surpass an Oliver Stone movie.
For a diversion, it could be worse. But with this much production value and a promising cast, it's a bloated fat ass in polyester, a disappointment. James Caan and Alan Arkin are not just missed--they are now official deities.