Give me Back my Two and a Half Hours

Rating: 1/10 (25 April 2007)

Let me start out by saying that this was one of the worst films ever...but what would you expect from the same guy that gave us "The Thin Red Line?" This film was ridiculously drawn out and with almost no dialogue to fill in the gaps. I appreciated the fact that this film gave us the truer version of Pocahontas, rather than the garbage we're fed in school. However, even that didn't carry this film into cinematic wonder. This film was terrible. And can someone tell me why no one bothered to cover up Colin Farrel's tattoos? The script for this two and a half hour epic piece of crap couldn't have been longer than that of a half hour sitcom. I feel sorry for the composer. He had to go through the painstaking trouble of trying to fill in fifteen minute gaps with music that (hopefully) carried the story along...because the actors sure weren't doing it. I know that with film, you are supposed to show rather than tell, but how long do you need to show two people making out? I should have known this film was crap, it did get several Oscar nominations. Words to live by: "If the critics think it's great, it probably isn't." This film helped prove that theory. I gave it a 1...but only because there is no half.