At least something happens in Gigli

Rating: 1/10 (23 January 2006)

What a snooze-fest. People in the theater actually fell asleep during the film. The guy next to me started snoring.
This movie starts out slow and boring, and doest change. Nothing Happens!!! Ever!! I kept waiting for something to happen to pick the movie up but it doest. It's 2 1/2 hours of nothing happening followed by 3 minutes of some random crap and naked indians running out of doorways in england.
The only good part of the film was the Pocahantas not wearing any underwear while frolicking in the fields. The girl herself is a butterface, although she has an gorgeous smile.
Honestly, you can read through the book version in 10 minutes, there are maybe 40 words in the entire film. Followed by five minute montages of water flowing, Indian girl frolicking, doing some ritual, Colin Ferrel disappears, babies pop out of nowhere. Years go by without you knowing because nobody ages. Batman appears out of the blue, Pocahontas becomes psychic to find out Colin isn't dead.
The whole movie seemed like a really expensive and badly made student film. at least random shots of a drunk woman, face licking, and sad clowns flipping pancakes is more entertaining then this piece of human excrement.