"Adventure is reborn" (feet first!)

Rating: Null/10 (4 February 2002)

10 years after they stopped Imhotep taking over the world, Rick and Evelyn are married with a son, Alex. Again they accidentally set off a chain of events that awakens Imhotep from his resting place in the British Museum. However a second force has been released in the shape of the Scorpion King and Rick and Evelyn must race to stop both from destroying the world. Meanwhile Evelyn begins to experience flashbacks that reveal that she may have been Princess Netertiri, daughter of Pharaoh Seti.
As with every big blockbuster, a sequel is inevitable. It generally doesn't matter whether the first film was good or not, or if the sequel is well thought out or not. It only matters that it guaranteed to make a set percentage of the original's profit and therefore not a risk. The story here feels forced from the very start - first the introduction of the kid makes it feel like they're just trying to keep it interesting by adding characters (if the first film was like Raiders then this is definitely Temple of Doom). Secondly we suddenly discover that Evelyn is the reincarnation of Princess Nefertiri! How come this little gem never came out in the first film? The addition of 'The Scorpion King' is so minor that you wonder why they used his character at all - then you see that the Mummy 3 will be subtitled 'the scorpion king' and you realise that it was just another excuse to spin money (especially when you see that The Rock was put in the role).
The fact that the script has stopped trying is a real drain on how much fun you can have. Right from the start (the fight in Rick's house) you see this - all the main characters just 'show up' at the fight at exactly the right time! Even Ardeth Bay and Jonathon show up - despite the fact that Ardeth just came from Egypt! This laziness is apparent all through the film, it relies on big bangs and OTT action scenes to carry the film.
Fraser loses another truck load of credibility by doing this - he's good, but it's obvious that he was too blinded by dollars to read the script. Weisz is terrible - even if she gets more of an action role, her character is still daft. Hannah seems to know he's in rubbish and just wants to get through it and get paid. Boath as the young Alex is all cute, cheeky child adventuring - a perfect example of how cute children are the death of films.
For me the saddest performance was Lock-Nah (Adewae Akinnuoye-Agbaje) - it was sad because I know what he's capable of. For anyone who's seen HBO's Oz he played the monstrous Simon Adebesi. In Oz Adewale gave a great performance over 3 or 4 series where his character changed significantly, so he can act but he's never going to be a leading man, so I guess he was happy to get in a big film.
Overall this is laughable - unlike the first movie, it's impossible to ignore the sheer daftness of the whole thing. If you don't believe that this is merely a money spinning production rather than an attempt to make a good film then check out the special effects on the Scorpion King at the end. They look so terrible (like a Sega mega-drive's effects) because the effects process was rushed through in order to get the film out into the market.