Overkill from the drawing board - But fun

Rating: Null/10 (7 December 2001)

One SERIOUS recommendation before you watch this one: Watch "The Mummy" first! From there on it's much easier to see TMR in the right spirit - or not at all. For those who loved the first one - depending on WHAT they loved about it - the sequel will range from utter disappointment to utter fun. For those who didn't like "The Mummy" at all, there can only be one rule: Stay away from the sequel at all cost... and also from this comment.
Right..., with that out of the way, we can go down to brass tactics. First: The sequel is no match for the original. "The Mummy" sported many of the virtues which made the 3 Indys adventure movie classics and can rightfully be called the best clone yet. The Indys are even more to be considered in so far as they are the only classic adventure movie series in existence which can boast a flawless line of equally good parts, one building on the other.
That's where TMR fall seriously short. I guess it fell in the same cash-gilded trap as Episode I and, to a far lesser extent, Return Of The Jedi.
EVERY scene is virtually screaming: "We want to top the first one!" But desperation never fares well in storytelling - especially in that genre. Someone had analyzed and dissected "The Mummy" into its 'obvious' aspects and labeled them for the sequel's spare parts depot. Nothing wrong in that - as long as someone has the wisdom to wait for the main ingredient which made the original a great movie: A good script. Almost every scene seems like a fast excuse for nifty visual effect. Almost every dialogue/gag seems like a carbon copy from the old script, just with an afterburner tied to every line. Pity that this time there isn't a decent story to bind the gags, and so it degenerates to a kind of choppy sitcom. That makes the fact that the gags are not half as good as the original's stand out even more.
The weakness of the script puts an incredible drag on the movie's natural pace, which had to be compensated by an ever faster sequence of 'highlights' piled on each other without any support from the story. The by far weakest aspect of the script is sadly also the one which - if done right - could've pushed the whole project into the class of "The Mummy": The Baddies. They failed on each of them in a different way, but always with the same result. No real threat. The Mummy itself suffered from the typical sequel disease. Totally overdone and drowned in FX. No match for its former truly scary and also dangerously luring 'glory'. (No blame on the actor. He wrestled an impossible foe: A story which didn't really give a toss about him.)
The Scorpion King: He was only a special effect right from the start until his bitter Playstation end. The Rock's attempts at 'Mineral wants to play Animal' didn't help there, of course. Such legends as the Scorpion King's aren't drawn from biceps but from real power - and The Rock's - I hesitate to say acting - was as powerful as a dead sheep plugged on to high voltage to make it twitch at the right moment.
Ankh-Su-Namun: In a way, she is by far the most tragic failure in the 'threat department', because she had the greatest potential to STILL pull off the impossible after the two main baddies had pulled out on grounds of million dollar invisibility. While everyone on the team was frantically busy to create one WHOW! after the other, nobody noticed that they had far more than just a stunningly beautiful lady waiting in the wings to make the air move. While everybody was hamming like mad, Patricia Velasques took hold of the painfully few effective scenes she had and tackled them with almost too extreme economy, which made her stick out even more. The camera mostly treated her like a beautiful ornament glued to the appropriate biceps, or doing what second row minions do before the big one is at hand. Seen like that, PV turned impossible odds into an advantage. Like a black jaguar prowling every scene - 'almost' too quiet - 'almost' too understated - and ALWAYS ruling the screen. Sure, Patricia Velasques is a looker to define all lookers, and therefore already reason enough to watch this movie on purely aesthetic reasons, but in her case that's really just the icing on the cake. She has real presence. Give her half a decent line and half a decent scene to chill already yawning viewers, and suddenly you've got your threat to consider beyond the next bunch of FX extravaganzas. But alas..., all was wasted. They never gave her more than the occasional bone to feed on - and the most pathetic exit of all. A few coffee filled nights of brainstorming over the script to make her the real and unexpected danger - the real power rising, when none of the ancient Uber-Hunks is looking - would've given this predictable rumble of testosterone a REAL twist. Dark and quietly moving danger as the perfect counterweight to unhinge all the loudness running amok.
Perfect. Ah, well...
As far as the 'goodies' are concerned, the acting was adequate and fitting the glossy but pretty empty frame. John Hannah, though, was even more wasted than in the first one, since they turned his character into a truly annoying fool, now. But on the whole, this goes for everyone on the cast. They were better than the story deserved. Hamming til the cows came out was the only way to give this wreck the fitting 'glue' and save it from falling totally apart.
Which brings me to the plus-side of this movie. Yes, there is one. Above all, it's fun, once expectations have been leveled to just that. And, oddly enough, it grows on you, if you're prepared to give it a second chance at home. Once, you've stopped caring for the overall story, you begin to appreciate the 'set pieces' - and there are quite a few to enjoy.
The effects range from stunning to ridiculous. The whole movie takes much less care of believability and coherence of atmosphere than the first one, and that's a serious drawback on the general tone. It's now closer to a Fantasy romp than an Indy type adventure. That's why - in the end - this movie's more like a collection of more or less good set pieces, failing to merge into a story, but also leaving some honestly entertaining moments behind. There are far worse ways to spend a fun evening at home.
Schogger13