George of the Jungle parodies mummy movies

Rating: Null/10 (18 May 1999)

They were trying to make a parody, right? The Mummy ends up parodying every monster movie ever made. The pacing, the dialogue, everything...very predictable. The dialogue and action sets us up, and then follows through with no surprises whatsoever. Nothing was scary; nothing was surprising. Everything from the bugs to the "don't read the book!" to the Americans and the Egyptologist getting it, to the end fight scenes and the sinking of the city...all set up...ugh! Why didn't they just send a telegraph instead...oh, wait, they did. I was more entertained by counting how many different plot points they gave away before they happened than the movie itself. The mummies weren't scary at all. They looked more like actors dressed up in rags doing the moonwalk. Also, when the whole audience breaks out in laughter when a poor extra gets vacuumed by the scarabs, then there's a severe problem.
The special effects and sets are great. The acting was acceptable, if you can stand George of the Jungle in Egypt. Fraiser made the movie comical, but I think the director, other actors, scriptwriter, etc. didn't realize how comical they were really being. If there had been an attempt to make this a parody, instead of an "action/horror" flick, it would have been much better.
So, if you have no intelligence and enjoy being beat over the back of the head with a board labeled "PLOT", then go see the Mummy. As for me, I'm going to go find the bottle named Alieve. Maybe it'll soothe my aching head.