Reloading isn't always a good thing

Rating: Null/10 (26 May 2003)

Ah, the day has finally come! I polished my shoes, put on my best shirt, and went to what I considered to be the main event of the week. Finally, the screening of the blockbuster sequel to The Matrix. It was worth putting in those extra hours so I could afford myself this once-in-a-lifetime experience (well, actually it's three times) of watching a movie of this magnitude. Heck, I even treated myself to a large Coke on the way in - this is a special event, right?
As it turns out, we were treated to a story-plot that could easily fit in a 12-page kids storybook (with some room to spare for pictures). At first, I kept thinking the directors let a little p*** run to their head, and we'll find out in the end that they are the "ONE". But hey, wasn't I a firm believer in "it doesn't matter what you sell, as long as you sell it"?! And believe me, judging by the crowds, this movie is selling like ice-cream in a weight-watcher's convention. Kudos to the directors/writers/supreme beings!
The film did have its highlights, though. One of them was watching the 9-out-of-10-on-a-sexy-scale Kary-Ann Moss hack into a computer using REAL (that's right, REAL) unix commands and scripts. I could see why this is every hacker's wet dream; they probably think: "oh, imagine her sitting next to me on this never-before-felt-a-woman's-behind chair, and we're hacking away on my computer, and we make wild love every time we get a successful hack", or something along these lines. Come to think of it, there were some unix freaks amongst us who got a little jumpy during this scene...
What the film was lacking in plot, it more than made up for in action. The martial arts sequences could easily make a Jet-Li fight sequence seem like an instructional video for folk-dancing. The Jackie-Chan groupies amongst us (and you know who they are) were certainly impressed, but I must admit I was also nodding my head in approval. At some point the sequences even reached 300 ppm (punches-per-minute)! Some other scenes to remember were a 2000 person dance party (probably filmed in Ibiza without the people noticing), a five minute exchange of intellectual phrases that made me wish I had brought along my notepad, and again the beautifully constructed body of Kary-Ann in full leather riding on a motorcycle (with a little promotion for Ducati bikes).
In conclusion: I'd rate this film 7 out of 10. This film sure beats the crap out of HBO reruns, so if you've got no other plans, go see it! However, if your movie budget is a little tight and you're waiting for something special to shell out a few bucks on, I'd hold out a little longer 'till X-Men 2 or Terminator 3 reach your neighborhood cinema. In hindsight, being a computer user I should've known this is how things would turn out, based on the film's name; after all, when you "reload" a computer application doesn't that mean something bad just happened?