Matrix: Re-Bloated

Rating: Null/10 (20 May 2003)

The first MATRIX movie smoothly integrated its "philosophy" with dynamic action. THE MATRIX struck a perfect balance. RELOADED does the exact opposite ... you get long, boring, quasi-philosophical rants that drag on for ten minutes, which are then followed by 15-minute action sequences. There's NO integration. And really, some of the philosophical mumbo-jumbo is just that: mumbo jumbo. C'mon: how many times did the concepts of "choice" vs. "fate" vs. "control" really need to be reiterated?
The action scenes were WAY too long (hello Mr. Editor). Everything about Zion sucked. Again, the windbag philosophical diatribes were ridiculous -- they added NOTHING to the plot. To those who keep saying, "you just don't understand RELOADED," there's really nothing to "misunderstand" about the latest MATRIX flick!!! It's a film that tries to appear more complicated than it is ... and it does so in a very tired "Hollywood" way. Stitching together a bunch of philosophical references is no more profound than stitching together a bunch of pop-culture references ... neither approach will work if the basic plot structure is weak.
In truth, nothing happens in RELOADED save the last ten minutes. The plot is no more compelling than a QUAKE game, nor is it presented with any more sincerity.
POSSIBLE SPOILER: I fear that the next flick will continue to wreck everything cool about the first MATRIX movie. The "matrix inside of a matrix" thing is just lame. I really hope that's not where we're heading. If it is, I hope that it turns out that NO humans exist ... that everyone including Neo is a program or a machine. It would explain Reeves' robotic acting.
Oh, and don't be a fool who sits through the ten minutes of credits to see the REVISITED teaser ... the trailer ain't worth it. Not to mention the fact that you'll see it again elsewhere before November.