Diabolical Non-Movie

Rating: 1/10 (29 May 2003)

1/10. A non-movie, written and directed with autistic adolescent boys in mind. There is little discernible story, no drama, no empathetic characters, and a lot of slow, pompous psychoblather masquerading as "profound" dialogue. Whoever wrote that drivel appears to have never conversed with anyone with a triple-figure IQ. The actors clearly have a hard time working out what to do with meaningless waffle. What passes for a story is a collage of surrealised Kung Fu sequences and car chases, endlessly prolonged for no reason except obsession with "action" for its own sake. Good special FX totally abused. Don't waste your time, unless you have been subjected to the subliminal mind-control rays that make this seem good.