The most democratic movie possible: insults everyone

Rating: 1/10 (12 February 2011)

All I can say is, wow. Is it possible that a once talented showman became so suicidal that he managed to talk people into giving him 60 million dollars so he could make this career-ender? Masochism is a multi-layered thing. This movie is one long puerile penis joke. What was funny in the context of trailer park losers Wayne and Garth twenty years ago has become an insult to the public. Myers is nearly 50 years old, for heaven's sake, and the best he can come up with is two elephants copulating on the ice in game 7 of the Stanley Cup? Are people that venal to star in this POS? I understand Jessica Alba, like who knew it would be this bad, but the others? There's no excuse to compromise other people's careers if Myers has a death wish, which he apparently does. Penis jokes, testicle jokes, scrotum jokes, ass jokes, it's all too much. Not to mention racist, an insult to Indians, to Maple Leaf fans, to short people, to Jessica Alba fans, to everyone. I guess this is also a tribute to the Hollywood system, where Myers' inflated ego on the basis of the Shrek cash cow can actually convince real human beings to give him a gadzillion dollars. I won't even mention the starving Africans and Indians who could have used the money, it's an insult to them. Hell, building a sewage treatment plant with this money would have done humanity a major favour. Didn't anyone have the courage somewhere along the line to tell Myers to reign it in, to hire a decent scriptwriter if he no longer has it, or just perhaps to rest on his Shrek laurels and play golf? What's really disturbing isn't that this isn't funny (most things aren't), but that it's really mean-spirited. The only redeeming features are Justin Timberlake (who knew?) and a Verne Troyer outtake over the credits. The other 89 and a half minutes should be consigned to Heaven's Gate hell, and Myers should apologise to everyone involved.