Spielberg shows contempt for his audience

Rating: 1/10 (20 October 2009)

That's the only assumption I can make from this terrible sequel to an exciting original (albeit one that was dumbed down from its source novel).
I wish I could have listened in to the story conferences for this piece of schlock: "I've got it! There's another island nobody knows about because all the architects and engineers and scientists and the accountants who kept InGen's books have been sworn to secrecy" "Yeah! But this time they want to keep it safe" "Yeah! But then there are these bad guys who still want to exploit the dinosaurs" "Yeah! But then it all goes wrong and they get eaten" "Yeah! But then they get one and bring it home" etc...
Spielberg badly overplays his tried-and-true nerve janglers here. In "Jaws" we had the dismembered head in the boat, in "Jurassic Park" it was the detached arm, here we have a hand clutching a ship's wheel (what ate the crew by the way, and what happened to it? Surely the T-Rex didn't just have a quick snack and head back to the hold?). We see water discoloured by blood more than once. I felt Spielberg was saying "You know what? I made 'Schindler's List', but you guys just want more of this stuff. OK, to hell with you, here it is and good luck!" By the time the T-Rex was charging through San Diego I felt I was back in the days of "Beast from 20,000 Fathoms". Away from the primeval atmosphere of the tropics the film lost any suspense it might have had.
To give credit where I feel it is due, Arliss Howard's accent had me laughing out loud whenever he spoke: is it just me or did he sound very like a certain heir to the throne of England?