Predictable snooze-fest

Rating: Null/10 (18 December 2002)

The same kind of juvenile childishness that makes people watch Star Wars will make people watch yet another episode of Lord of the Rings. This film is nothing more than a vehicle for flashy special effects. To some people this is enough to consider Peter Jackson a genius. To me, it is a waste of an adult's time.
The Lord of the Rings is a fine book for children. It really is. But adults are supposedly capable of distinguishing more sophisticated plotlines than all this hogwash about good versus evil, aren't they?
The dialogue in this film, as in the last, is atrocious. There is a self-importance about the film that is equally annoying. Remember, this is fantasy-entertainment, nothing more. People who treat this with Biblical importance are missing something in life.
People who dismiss this movie will themselves be dismissed as killjoys with no sense of fun -- and the box office will make fools of us all. That's OK. I've seen real speculative fiction turned into a true work of genius -- the American "Solaris" and witnessed people walking out bored, so I know that most audiences obviously only want to be spoon-fed predictable gruel. Film-goers want a battle every 30 minutes otherwise they will fall asleep. Well, for some us, it sends us to sleep to watch a battle every 30 minutes when you know that the goodies will ultimately prevail. There is not a single surpising or unique aspect to this film.
In conclusion, I see this film not as a work of art but rather as a shrewd economic investment. McDonalds has thrived for years by selling people exactly the sort of bland food that they expect. The Lord of the Rings achieves the same. The only thing more predictable than this film is that this is an investment that will definitely pay off.