Remakes - should accept abuse

Rating: 2/10 (5 June 2005)

First let me say that any movie that is a re-make should expect comparison and face the wrath, especially if the original is of extremely high quality.
1. The Warden - I'm sorry but, the gritty performance that Eddie Albert is far superior. His warden was just mean. You could see the hate in his eyes and the contempt he held for anything and everything. The way he spoke when upset, you could see him grinding his teeth.
2. Caretaker - Unfortunately, when you grab a comedian like Chris Rock, the humor that this movie is directed at requires that it be his type of humor. The end result, though, funny CR adds nothing new to the role. And it's about high time CR step out of his style of humor and do more challenging work. IE Tom Hanks, Jamie Fox (just a note - Ray was a joke - one long music video - Enjoyably, but Oscar worthy, I don't think so). The role caretaker could really have done it for him. Hell, even the name tells you what the role is about. A role that Morgan Freeman does so well SSR (robbbed of the Oscar that man was).
3. Crewe - Sandler does an acceptable performance and this along with Spanlish you can see that he wants to step out of the typical Sandler role.
4. Nate - The problem for me is that because this movie went for the jokes it waisted the pivotal role the Nates character was in the original. Nate's character went into the game because Crewe's character had quit and it was when he got his knee broken that Crewe's character shifts.
5. Players - Did a pretty good job, especially finding a David Keith look alike. Except he shouldn't have been playing the psychotic character. The reason the psycho character was so great for me was that he wasn't the biggest one, but he was definitely the last one you would ever want to be in a room together with. They were acceptable, but lacked the grittiness of the original players and way over done on the joke aspect.
6. Guards - Again acceptable, but jokes over done. Especially the Estrogen joke. The original did a great job of focusing at the end and this movie distracts from this by overplaying the hormone Joke.
7. Captain Knucker - Fintchner does a good part of it. But the problem is that they give too much expose of whether we should view him as a good guy or not. The original its not clear as to if he is a good guy, or is he more disgusted by the Warden that he doesn't shoot Crewe.
8. Warden's Side kick - What joke this character was. I know that in the original all he does is walk around, but the one line he gives at the end of the movie and how he delivers it "His store re.", is incredible. This one scene is living proof that "there are no small roles only small actors." Give Albert's Warden an ice shower and he'd a shot them on the spot.
9. Showeroom seen - Reynold's Crewe speech is more mocking the Wardens inability to be out on the field versus Sandler's "I wish you were out there". It is a way of calling the Warden impotent.
10. Caretakers death - Again the movie lightens it up by not showing the man burning or hearing him scream.
OK, but the absolutely unforgivable thing I have is the letting the audience off the hook scene. I have to say now, that I hated this when I first saw the original, but now I see how brilliant the original movie makers were. Can you guess where I'm going? That's right, the original gives the impression that Reynold's Crewe will spend the rest of his life in prison, this one lets you off the hook. I can't forgive this, because the original leaves a bitter sweet feeling. Yeah, he won the game, but damn. He's going to spend the rest of his life in prison. Which makes it more ironic when he walks off with Pop.
11. Side problems - A film maker does have some moral responsibility to society. Drunk Driving is just not acceptable. To diminish it as a joke, well it's just in bad taste. Just because you can do something, does not mean you should do it. The point of any art is to influence people - to laugh, to cry, to think, to motivate etc. As a result an artist should be careful what he does, because if he is to accept the good things that his art inspires, than he must also accept those negative things it inspires. Getting off the soap box for a moment, the original doesn't let Crewe's character off the hook in this respect. We immediately view him as a flawed man and rooting for him is not meant to be easy for us. The way they played it was just for laughs, how about him hurting someone.
I guess you can some up for me that this Mean Machine, had no Machine and a lot less Mean. My suggestion watch the Soccer Version "Mean Machine" It keeps better faith to the grittiness of the Original.
The sad part of it is, I would have liked this movie if had not been for the original. This is proof of what happens when your bring the peripheral humor to the foreground.