Without question one of the most divisive films you'll ever see

Rating: 1/10 (12 April 2016)

I honestly don't even know where to start with this review. I suppose I'll start with the plot, which has something to do with single people being sent away to a hotel where they're given a certain amount of time to fall in love, or they are turned into an animal of their choice. The premise seemed somewhat interesting to me, but having just finished the film, I can honestly say that was the biggest waste of 110 minutes in my life.
The dialog in this film and the way the characters behave are absolutely ridiculous, not to mention a score that I can't even begin to describe how strange and annoying it was. The camera lingers for an uncomfortable amount of time frequently, and the beginning scene to hook the viewer is never visited again. The few redeeming qualities the movie had were completely overshadowed by the ridiculousness, and the more I think of the events in the movie, the more angry I feel of having wasted my time.
When rating a film, I try to be as fair as I possibly can, and if there are some redeeming qualities I will recognize and account for them in my review. Unfortunately for The Lobster, I cannot be honest with myself and give this more than 1 star; that's how appalling I found the film. I almost gave this an additional star for the couple moments that made me chuckle, or the satisfaction of certain characters dying, but the last shot made me just stare blindly at the screen with disbelief. Not a shocked disbelief, but the disbelief that I did not turn the film off and do something constructive with my time (as I almost did more than once). It is for this reason that I cannot give the film more than 1 star.
Some will see The Lobster and consider it an extraordinarily accurate satire of our society, and point out the metaphors in the film. While that may be true, great metaphors don't always make great movies. Such is the case for The Lobster, and I feel that if you do spend time watching this, you will either love it for what it is, or hate yourself for watching it.