Avoid. Very Disturbing

Rating: 1/10 (5 August 2016)

David (Colin Farrell) checks in to the Hotel with his brother who has been changed into a dog. (Whaat??) He will have 45-days to get a partner and if he doesn't he will be turned into an animal of his choice. (Whaaat??) David decides he wants to be turned into a Lobster. (Whaat??) Oh, this Is not a surprise as he agrees to this. (Whaaat??) If he finds a mate and there are problems he will be given a child that will act as a buffer.
Some may see the name Colin Farrell and decide to watch. In this case it's tsk, tsk, tsk. This is a warning of sorts. Avoid this. There are many disturbing images in here and dialogues that describe some very unspeakable things that could happen. It has been mentioned that Colin Farrell gained about 40-pounds for this role. Why I am not sure, but I thought the 40-pounds looked good on him. So if you didn't know that he gained 40-pounds, you probably will not recognize him. I didn't .
Yes, this is a satire, but a very unconventional one. It mocks relationships and pretensions that we go thru to show normality for the most part. All dialogues are mono-toned and no emotions are shown regardless of what just happened. Oh, WAIT, John C. Riley as Robert the Lisping Man has his fingers put into a hot toaster as punishment for masturbating (he got caught) as that is not allowed. He does scream and shows emotions. Sexual stimulation is allowed but only given by a maid in a sort of lap dance way.
There is another group of people who live in the woods and are called "Loners." And these Loners are hunted and tranquilized by the people from the Hotel. It is against the law to flirt or have relationships among these Loners. David escapes to these people and finds the Short Sighted Woman (Rachel Weisz) and they fall for each other and have to be careful not to draw attention to themselves. The Loner Leader (Lea Seydoux) discovers that the Short-Sighted woman becomes close to David and encourages her to have her eyes fixed, but this operation intentionally leaves the Short Sighted Woman blind. One of the last scenes shows David and the now blind woman in a restaurant. David orders a steak knife and goes into the bathroom to blind himself. We don't know if he goes through with it as the movie ends. Is it possible he didn't go thru with it and returned to the Hotel to become a Lobster? (Who cares?)
I have mentioned many things that perhaps, I shouldn't have, but you need to know that his is not an entertaining movie. It is deeply disturbing and you have only been given a small sampling of some disturbing images and dialogues. Yes, there are many more. (Whaaat?) Remember: this is a satire and mocks relationships.
Here's the thing. I saw that Colin Farrell was in this and decided to watch. Tsk. Tsk. Tsk.
What this movie is trying to accomplish is beyond me. (Agreed) (1/10)
Violence: Yes. Sex: Yes, regular and that lap dance way. Nudity: Yes. Disturbing Images: Yes. Language: Yes.