Where the Crud Do I Begin?

Rating: 3/10 (15 June 2014)

It's summer time, which means MORE REVIEWS! I'm starting out the season by reviewing Disney animated films, beginning with the Renaissance from the late '80s/early '90s. With that, let's talk about "The Little Mermaid!"
ANIMATION: The animation is really spectacular! I can see why this film sparked the Disney Renaissance - it just looks amazing! I love the colors, the lighting, the fluent movement of the people - but you're always reminded that it's animated. It's a stylized art, and it's animation at its best.
SONGS/MUSIC: Obviously, this movie has some really impressive and memorable songs. Everybody remembers "Under the Sea," and, I have to admit, I like the song as well. The song I enjoy more than that is "Part of Your World." I love the music, I love the way it sounds. Howard Ashman and Alan Menken definitely knew how to make these songs sound like they were taken straight from Broadway! I don't know if I like the lyrics though, but we'll get to that later. My favorite song from the movie, though, is "POOR UNFORTUNATE SOUL!!!!" This song kicks butt! I don't want to talk too much about it now, but my goodness! The lyrics, the music, the singer - the song is just unbelievable! You can tell so much energy and passion was thrown into this!
ROMANCE: I'll be honest, this movie has a nice romantic element. I don't think it's Disney's best, but you do believe these characters are in love. They're willing to risk anything to be together, they can't stop thinking about each other, and, unlike Disney's earlier romances, Eric and Ariel actually have to work to fall in love; it's not necessarily love at first sight...not necessarily. I'll give it a pass here.
CHARACTERS: -URSULA - Good grief, I FRICKIN' LOVE URSULA!! One of the main reasons I love the "Poor Unfortunate Soul" number is because of her! Yes she's diabolical, manipulative, and menacing - and she's crudded awesome at being all those things! - but the real reason I love her is her character! She has a great character in this movie! She's not bland and boring - she has attitude! She has sass! She's a hard cold, lay-the-truth-out-for-you-nice-and-easy, get-what-she-wants type of character! If she were real...and human...and Saved...and not evil...I would totally marry her!
-SEBASTIAN/SCUTTLE - These guys are OK. There are a few times I find them a little annoying, but even then they're not THAT annoying. They have some nice moments, and overall they are some good guys.
ERIC – Who the crud is this guy? Aside from his name and being nice, I don't remember too much from him. He's like the earlier Disney princes...but he talks.
-FLOUNDER - I don't like Flounder! I know he's cute and all, but he's not that good of a character to me. He's Ariel's closest friend, right? Then why doesn't he ever tell her that maybe she shouldn't disobey her father? He's a supportive friend - no question about it. But he should have told her, "Ariel...Stop it."
-KING TRITON - Before I saw this movie, I heard what a strong, powerful father he is. I was expecting him to be a sort of pre-Mufasa. What do we get instead? He's the stereotypical parent who doesn't understand and doesn't want to listen to his child. When he warned Ariel about going near humans, I was expecting there to be a reason for it. Was there a reason? Not at all! He just has a prejudice against land for some unknown reason, and we never figure out why. He's not that bad of a character; in fact, I really like him. He loves his daughter, he's a strong parent, and he has great power. But from a dramatic standpoint, his lack of reason for why Ariel can't go to land makes him look unfair and cruel. To be fair, that's fine. She's your daughter and should do what you say. But if you reward her for doing what she shouldn't despite the fact that you forbade her from doing it in the first place, you look kind of weird.
FINALLY...
-ARIEL - ...Where the crud do I begin? She's selfish! If she had an option to take anything back, I don't think she would! Why? Because not only did she know what she was doing (deliberately going behind her father's back and disobeying him), but she got everything she wanted! Yes, despite her rebellion and causing so much trouble for everyone around her, she still got her precious Happily Ever After! What the crud? Her song "Part of Your World," though it sounds nice, is basically her just whining about her not being content with anything she has; and she won't be satisfied until she has more! It wouldn't bother me as much if it weren't for the fact that Ariel is the main character - the character we're supposed to learn from and identify with? What does she teach us? "Hey kids! If you do the opposite of what your parents say, you'll live happily ever after! They're just parents! Just because they're older than you doesn't mean they're smarter and wiser and more experienced than you!" I'm not asking for her to be perfect, but I don't think she learned a lesson in this film. When she apologizes to her father towards the end, I think she was saying that because Ursula caught her. If she didn't mean any of the trouble she caused, she wouldn't have caused it.
CONCLUSION: There are things I'm passionately against in this movie, but I can't just up and say I hate it. I still think the things I mentioned earlier are great. If some of the characters and the moral wasn't so ethically flawed, I'd enjoy this movie a lot more. As is, it's OK. Take what I said and see if you agree or disagree. BOOYIKA!