Doesn't Do Enough to Distinguish Itself, Most Changes it Does Make Are Bad

Rating: 5/10 (22 July 2019)

I give this one a 5/10 because it is mostly the same great movie from the 90's. Aside from a few additions and subtractions, the film is almost entirely a shot-for-shot remake of the original. So instead of focussing on that, I'll be focussing on the (very few) significant changes made to the plot of the film.
Firstly, the film is almost entirely photorealistic. Meaning, certain more surreal and cartoony scenes are redone, most notably the musical numbers "I Just Can't Wait To Be King" and "Hakuna Matata". You've already probably heard of the small controversy surrounding 'Can You Feel The Love Tonight'', which for some reason is now set in the afternoon instead of evening. It's silly changes like this that are most distracting.
Another change is made to the Hyenas. In the original, the Hyenas are more-or-less meant to be representations of the underclass of society, with Scar representing a populist Dictator promising more to the hyenas to get their allegiance. They are shown as stupid and gullible in the original, and some people have interpreted this as classist. This is something that I guess Disney wanted to 'Fix' in the remake, so instead, the Hyenas here are shown as a rival kingdom who has exhausted their resources, and Scar offers an alliance with them, promising to share the food in exchange for them starting the stampede that killed Mufasa.
Which brings me to the main villain, Scar. In the original film, Scar was one of the many campy villains of the DIsney Renaissance, being smart, cunning, and a little effeminate, as opposed to the brutish and masculine Mufasa. In the remake, they decided to remove the campy elements of the character, and instead he is both jealous of Mufasa's power, and the fact that Mufasa won the affections of Sarabi. Yes, in this version, Scar is motivated by lust for Simba's mum. I guess that's a bit closer to Hamlet? Maybe? Who knows? I won't say it's a bad change, just a neutral change that makes Scar a competent but less memorable villain.
Now, one thing I do like about the remake that is different from the original is Timon and Pumba. Billy Eichner as Timon definitely plays up the 'gay' vibe that the original character had. And Seth Rogen as Pumba works really well. His casting as Pumba was spot on, while still being distinct from Ernie Sabella's original portrayal of the character. The duo is also the most 'self aware' of the film, in the sense that they make several coy fourth-wall-breaking jokes at the expense of the remake. I think that they were given the most creative freedom in terms of riffing off the original, and while it's not 'better' than the original, I can certainly appreciate its attempts to distinguish itself, especially compared to the rest of the film that makes barely any changes.
There are also a couple more scenes added with adult Nala (to justify the casting of Beyonce, no doubt) but they don't add much to the plot or change it in any significant way.
My biggest problem with the remake is just the overall pacing. While it is for the most part a shot for shot remake, it feels like a cover band whose drummer isn't the best, and occasionally misses a beat. The original film is short and sweet at 88 minutes, while the remake is 118 minutes, meaning they needed to make up about 20 extra minutes of runtime, which for the most part, aside from the few changes, was done by stretching and squishing the original scenes to different lengths, which throws off the natural rhythm a person who saw the original would have when watching this. There were several moments where I cringed at just the pacing of the film. I felt how off it was. It was weird and uncanny, moreso than the character design.
Overall, this film isn't really worth watching. It's gonna make millions of dollars off the nostalgia alone, but seriously, just find the original movie online streaming somewhere and watch that instead. Have a party where you watch the original, and call it the "Spite Disney Party". I'm not going to hold it against you if you do watch the remake. I mean, I watched it, I'd be a hypocrite if I made a moral judgement against people who watch this version, but seriously, don't do what I did. Save a bit of money and rent the original. This movie isn't bad, but there's a better version of it already out there.