Laughable attempt at philosophy or golf

Rating: 1/10 (4 June 2006)

I love the game of golf. I love movies with a good story. Hollywood has great success with fantasies but unfortunately golf is a sport that defies fantasy. Golf is a sport about things that you cannot portray on the screen and anyone who has played it seriously knows this well. Golf is an internal sport and it is very scientific. Magical characters don't suddenly appear in your head to show you the putting line that twists like a 30 foot boa over the Pyranees. Golf is about spending hours on your own on the putting range. It is a mental sport and if you had an ex-girlfriend chatting in your ear like a parrot while you tried to hit a drive, or a fictional Will Smith uttering maximus excrementia in your other ear just before a 200 yard carry over water you and everyone else on tour would probably shoot a lousy round of golf, perhaps your worst.
This movie illustrates everything that is wrong with Hollywood when it goes bad. It makes up fantasies, and suckles the world's children on them making them believe that heroism and success are merely a figment of the strongest imaginations. If I imagine and focus strongly enough I can simply hit a 3,000 yard drive. What's next Mr. Redford, SpiderMan Joins the Tour? Stay away from golf stories, they're mostly internal, sort of like chess on grass. By the way, Matt Damon is most obviously not a golfer.