Cowboys and Indians a la Japonnaise

Rating: Null/10 (1 January 2004)

I had earlier decided to give The Last Samurai a pass, inasmuch as I just couldn't imagine baby-faced Tom Cruise as a Samurai. However, after reading some reviews on these pages which indicated that the movie was not at all bad, I changed my mind and went to see it. I should have stuck with my original plan.
For all the beauty of the scenery, this movie is nothing but a rehash of the old cowboys and Indians formula: Enlightened blue-eyed white man savem backward brown-skinned - but noble - natives. Apparently this movie's makers had seen, and were impressed by, both "A Man Called Horse" with Richard Harris and "Little Big Man" with Dustin Hoffman. Unfortunately, this film is not in any way in the same league with those earlier films. To be more specific: the dialog was puerile, the characterizations were stereotypical, and the casting was bizarre. Oh, well, at least none of the Japanese were made to say, "rots of ruck."
I've always like British actor Timothy Spall, especially in the wonderful "Auf Wiedersehn, Pet" series, but he's horribly miscast as the British trade representative to Japan. When he refers to an idea as "capital" his pronunciation is enough to make one laugh - but this isn't a comedy. And speaking of comedy, the great comedian Billy Connolly has a smallish role in this film, but rather than being a Scot he plays an Irishman in the U.S. Cavalry. So, instead of hearing his delightful Glaswegian accent we are given him putting on an Irish brogue. Perhaps the director thought that if Billy were to speak with his natural voice he'd steal the whole movie right there and then. And, despite the good words on these pages, I found actor Ken Watanabe's portrayal of the Last Samurai as believable as I did that of David Carradine playing the monk on the "Kung Fu" television series.

Anyway, not everyone will share my opinion of this film. I actually heard someone sniffling and blowing her teary nose behind me in the theater, so I guess she was somehow moved by the film. I was a bit moved, too, so just before they rolled the credits I left my seat in order to be first in line at the loo.