Sugar-coated pill's just sour!

Rating: Null/10 (19 September 2003)

This isn't just a senseless bash at America or its movies, like many other comments. (For example, I agree that the musicals of the 'golden age' was Hollywood at its finest). However, modern Hollywood has once again proved itself to be a shadow of its former self, with this feeble remake of The Italian Job. Virtually every movie now HAS to have Americans recast as the heroes and the backdrop of 'downtown LA' a must for nearly every action thriller on the market. What a yawn! The excuse that it would have more global appeal is nonsense. What's London if its not one of the largest, most famous cities in the world (twice the size of LA), not to mention being the centre of the largest former empire on earth. How's that for global appeal? They talk about 'box office', but being British never did James Bond any harm! The new mini looks great, but the chase is not a patch on the original, despite being 34 years on. However, my biggest problem with the remake, which no critics on TV have mentioned, is the lack of humour and irony. The original had it in spades. It's a typical British thing that we can laugh at ourselves, hence the gang's quirky misfit nature (Professor Peach, Camp Freddy, etc.) and yet while they were massively outgunned by the Mafia on their own turf, they still 'took 'em to the cleaners!' The original was also typical of our 'lads, pints and pubs' culture that fitted the film perfectly, especially as we had recently won the World Cup in 1966. Paramount made both movies. It allowed the original characters to be English, so why the change now? Despite modern communication (like here), America seems more insular than ever! However, while this movie may be annoying, it's still based on fiction. Surely, more sinister is the new American habit of rewriting real history. Their plans to remake The Battle of Britain, provisionally entitled 'The Few' with - you've guessed it - an American in the title role, is not only scandalous, but dishonours the memory of those brave pilots of the RAF, who fell (outnumbered 3-1 against) whilst fighting off the Luftwaffe bomber offensive in 1940. Britain stood alone in the world then, as it was a full year before Pearl Harbour, when America officially joined the war! (There were only a handful of Americans on unofficial attachment during the Battle of Britain). Other movies have also had the Hollywood treatment. (The Enigma machine on a U-Boat was discovered by the Royal Navy, not the Americans. The list goes on...) This surely sets a dangerous precedent. Most American kids probably view the sugar-coated gloss of Hollywood when it comes to history, as fact. Now more than ever before, I think it has a responsibility to tell the truth and forget 'box office' when dealing with such massive issues ..... or alternatively, just stick to the Sci-fi and Bruce Willis in a vest!!
By the way, the spelling above IS correct ... REAL English (something else they've nicked!)