I had a stroke and died.

Rating: 1/10 (26 July 2005)

This movie made me sterile. Microsoft takes over the world and I cried. This film is a crime against humanity. Like communism, the only way to understand our enemy is to learn everything we can about it; So see this movie... as many times as you can. I can't wait for "transformers the movie". Nothing can prepare you for the awesomeness that is this... experience. I could not leave my seat for 5 minutes after the credits rolled it was that awesome. I picked a fight with 5 "gangstas" just to feel something other than the intense emotional pain this bestowed upon me. The island is real.... it's in my pants. The last true paradise on earth. I tried to get my money back, but they called the police when I started screaming "THE ISLAND IS REAL, THE ISLAND IS REAL!" in the main lobby. I have lost my will to live. How often in life can you say "Bad boys II was SO MUCH better than THIS MOVIE!"? It's a rare treat indeed.