Watch the Matrix Trilogy, smoke a spliff then watch Minority report  you've now seen "The Island".

Rating: 2/10 (14 October 2006)

My heart grieves to see Steve Buscemi and Ewan Mcgregor associated with this (Scarlett deserves all she gets).
This really is desperately, shockingly, weepingly bad  The Matrix without the style and the intellectual plot. Even our three stars' acting is wooden and stilted, like they were always aware of the crime they were committing and were trying not to think about it too much (I'm sure the dollars helped).
In fact, it's Matrix crossed with Minority Report and filtered through a zillion cheesy pop promos. Who was the DP on this schlock? The grade on the whole movie is saturated high-contrast, super bleached-out, which works great on a three minute hip-hop promo but gets seriously tedious on a two hour movie. Who, sweet baby Jesus, Mary and all the saints, wrote this? If he was more than a pre-pubescent 14 year-old, this viewer will be very surprised.
Ultimately it seems that everyone connected with it realises the full horror, Dr Frankenstein- like, of what they've created and just throw the entire remaining budget at the special effects. My friends, way too much, way too late.
And then there's the crass, hamfisted and obscenely intrusive product placement.
How did this film ever get made? Why in God's name did Steve, Ewan and Scarlett lend their name to it? We deserve to know, and director Michael Bay  who also gave us the "Bad Boys" oeuvre and, indeed, "The Lionel Richie Collection"  should be forced to watch it sober and straight - something he clearly never did when he was shooting it.
Bad, but not in a good way.