If People Valued Friendship and Loyalty Above Gold and War, What a Pleasant World It Would Be

Rating: 8/10 (21 August 2015)

The title of this review, of course, paraphrases probably the most important quote of either the "Hobbit" novel or movie trilogy. Thorin Oakenshield (Richard Armitage) regretfully utters the important quote when he finally realizes what devastation his quest for his mountain home of Erebor has wrought. That regret gives the final movie of the Hobbit Trilogy, "The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies" (hereafter "Five Armies") its sad, emotional weight. "Five Armies" delivers the sword/axe/spear wielding and battling excitement of its two predecessors, but this time the mind-spinning, heart-pumping action is tempered by a sobering thought: much of the fighting and devastation was a shameful waste.
Why? Well, with Bard's slaying of the rampaging dragon Smaug (mellifluous voice of Benedict Cumberbatch) with the Black Arrow that finds his Achilles heel (an unprotected opening in his neck), Thorin, the thirteen dwarfs, and Bilbo Baggins (Martin Freeman) have cemented their claim on Erebor and the ocean of gold and other treasures within. However, Smaug's attack on Laketown and his death throes after the arrow pierces him have effectively obliterated the town. All Laketowners, including the devious, pompous Master (Stephen Fry) and his sniveling toady (i.e. brown-noser) Alfrid Lickspittle (Ryan Gage), are now homeless refugees. After the Master's shocking but funny death, Bard the Bowman (Luke Evans) becomes de facto town leader. Bard goes to the Erebor stronghold to not only provide food and shelter for his people, but also to claim the town's rightful share of the dwarfs' treasure.
But some insidious sickness has altered Thorin's normally sensible and noble nature. He has contracted the dragon's ailment: acute gold fever. In fact, Thorin's mad thirst and greed for gold surpasses even Smaug's. Despite the pleas of the dwarfs, and especially Bilbo, Thorin refuses to negotiate at all with either the Laketowners or the elven army led by the imperious Thranduil (Lee Pace) who have come for THEIR rightful share. Men, elves, and dwarfs settle in for a long siege. Bilbo attempts to broker a peace with all three forces by offering the priceless dwarf jewel the Arkenstone (which he DID recover from Smaug) as a bargaining chip. Of course, this infuriates Thorin and leads to Bilbo's banishment from the dwarfs. Battle becomes dangerously imminent when Thorin manages to contact the Iron Dwarf Dain (Billy Connolly) and his mighty hordes to even the odds. Before long, though, the squabble over the gold escalates to fighting for sheer survival as the brutal, relentless, Azog the Defiler (Manu Bennett), Bolg (John Tui), and his deformed bunch of warriors, giants, and overall freaks catch up to Thorin and company. Needless to say, war breaks out.
As with the previous two movies, and despite purists' groans of protest, "Five Armies" largely adheres to the novel's structure. Two deviations, the turbulent confrontation of the wizards Gandalf (Ian McKellen), Galadriel (Cate Blanchett), and Saruman the White (dearly departed Christopher Lee) against the personification of darkness Sauron (Benedict Cumberbatch) and the still-baffling but tender relationship between female elf warrior Tauriel (Evangeline Lilly) and the dwarf Kili (Aidan Turner), continue from the previous movie. There are two others. One, Bard, on his own, discovers Smaug's weakness without Bilbo's help. In the previous movie, Bilbo spotted the dragon's weakness earlier. However, unlike in the novel, there is no thrush or any other messenger, human or animal, to convey that knowledge from Bilbo to Bard. Why the omission? I'm not really sure. It seems to deny Bilbo's instrumental part in getting rid of the dragon. The second deviation is the long-awaited, final showdown between Thorin and his relentless pursuer Azog, who whale on each other over a frozen river. Oh, yes, there is a third; the kryptonian fighting machine elf Legolas Greenleaf (Orlando Bloom) defies gravity to mix it up with Bolg. As with the previous two movies, the deviations mostly did not bother me, except, yes, not giving Bilbo credit for finding Smaug's crack in his scaly armor. Come to think of it, why didn't he tell Thorin and the dwarfs in the second movie about the weakness, to give them the chance to kill the dragon before he left for Laketown?
No matter; Bilbo acquits himself in other ways. Although many moviegoers felt Bilbo was marginalized, all three movies, including "Five Armies" demonstrate that he made a difference, even though in the novel, Bilbo's participation in the final battle was "rather unimportant". As already mentioned, he tried to broker a peace. Second, he does not desert his dwarf companions even after gold-mad Thorin tries to toss him off the ramparts. Third, his rock-throwing abilities, referenced in the novel, come in handy as he beans Azog's orc warriors like David slaying Goliath. Using his invisibility ring, Bilbo accompanies Legolas and Tauriel to warn the dwarfs about Bolg's army. Finally, his loyalty to and friendship with Thorin give him comfort after his recovery from gold fever and battle with Azog.
"Five Armies" paradoxically shows the cruel uselessness of war, especially for inherently useless gold. Evil beings might be vanquished, but good beings can also lose everything, including relationships and even lives, unnecessarily. However, as in the novel, "Five Armies" suggests that the only "good" war is one where evil IS vanquished or at least kept at bay. Through Bilbo's mere presence, "Five Armies" reveals that the way to a better, happier world is steadfast loyalty, friendship, and a desire for peace. Oh, good food and drink don't hurt either.