This is a letter I wrote M. Night

Rating: 1/10 (18 June 2008)

Dear M. Night Shyamalan: On June 16, 2008, I had the opportunity to see your latest theatrical release: The Happening. In the past, I have seen all of your major theatrical releases including The Sixth Sense, Unbreakable, Signs, The Village, and Lady in Water and therefore feel that it is my duty to convey some critique prior to discussing The Happening.
In 1999, I had the utmost pleasure in watching The Sixth Sense. In the months that followed, my friends, family and colleagues were overjoyed that a new voice had entered Hollywood. Your voice was creative, imaginative, and original which, at the time, seemed like a tall order. Looking at the onslaught of unoriginal garbage, remakes, and sequels Hollywood continues to produce (Two Hulk movies in 5 years c'mon), you were going to provide a fresh and unique voice. Following The Sixth Sense, your new fan base, including me, eagerly awaited your subsequent films. As noted, The Sixth Sense was good, Unbreakable worked, and Signs was suspenseful until the last twenty minutes. Then something happened. The Village was questionable and substandard and Lady in Water was unwatchable. Therefore, I questioned your talent. Then you wrote, directed, and produced The Happening.
After two box office failures (The Village and Lady in Water), the M. Night Shyamalan franchise needed a resurgence, a project to raise it from the depths of obscurity. The Happening, your first R-rated film, was your attempt and it failed miserably. First off, at no point was there any chemistry between Zooey Deschanel and Mark Wahlberg. At first, it seemed intentional considering their strained marriage, but never could the audience feel any connection. Second, when making an R-rated movie, cursing is permitted especially when it is a common term. The use of "bumbletown" rather than "bumblef*ck" is completely ridiculous. Third, the plot, characters, and dialogue felt like a late night movie on Cinemax. Who wrote this?...Must of been one of your two young daughters. Finally, with your career in the balance, you bank on global warming and murderous vegetation. Really??? All in all, Al Gore couldn't even sit through this film.
So, on June 16, 2008, I wasted 89 minutes of my life because of your clear lack of understanding what audiences want in a movie or because you would rather pad your pocket than produce quality work. The Sixth Sense seems now a lucky stab, a one in a million. Therefore, I request that you enclose $31 for my friends and I who attended The Happening. We believe this is only fair because you received $62 from our viewings of The Village and Lady in Water. If you are a dignified person, you will send the money.