Wait 'til after the credits, I bet the cast and crew pop out and laugh at us!!!

Rating: 1/10 (24 June 2008)

Really? This M Night has got a lot to answer for. At least to me anyway. I have been less than impressed with the man ever since I saw The Sixth Sense (big twist or no, it was still an artless bore) and through the years I have become increasingly aware that he has no place making films....would you want to be the director responsible for The Village?
This, however, had two things going for it; a mysterious, intriguing premise and a terrific trailer. People dying mysteriously left and right? Sure, i'm game for that, let's go out and see it.
From the outset I half-regretted my decision. Half regret because I - along with the rest of the cinema - was laughing my ASS off in addition to the pain.
This is why - despite being a 1/10 - I would recommend it.
It starts off setting the scene of mystery and foreboding; a scene that should create a tense atmosphere which the characters have to deal with. This tension is killed IMMEDIATELY by absolutely godawful acting. When the builder exclaimed his "surprise" at his colleagues falling all around him, I licked my fingers in between fits of uncontrollable laughter, already feeling full after 5 minutes of this ham-fest. In fact hamfest doesn't quite describe this...this turkey.
The pacing is simply awful. We end up right in the the "danger zone" with little chance to connect with the characters beforehand (except the obligatory character building base scene with Marky Mark at the school showing what a funny, likable character he really is; way to use Screen writing 101, M!) Scene selection is all over the place in terms of characterisation; some characters have a few scenes and are then killed off, with little chance to connect with them (although the acting makes them seem less like proper people and more like tools of the script, so there's little connection anyway). Even good ol' Marky Mark busts out a few hams. In fact, it seems as though M Night has an issue with consistency and continuity, be it in pacing or tone; I mean, the characters actually make JOKES?! JOKES when they're in the face of danger?!
So the pacing stinks and the character building is awful. Plot? If that's what you wanna call it. They end up in a house for the last ten minutes after running away from the wind (not making this up) with the secluded Mrs Jones, who remains disconnected from the world thus having no knowledge of the goings on outside. And it is in these final ten, twenty minutes that the true stupidity inherent in the film ramps up; expect more misplaced jokes and awful acting. After experiencing the non-ending and walking out, I felt myself echoing the sentiment of a fellow film-goer a few rows down: "That was the f**kin' most awful sh*t I've ever seen in my life".
It's not like it's a zero trick pony though, I mean M Night has also read the SuspenseWriting101 book as well it seems. The trees swaying in the neurotoxin-infested wind mix well with the music, and there are some cool death scenes, admittedly. So you might say that the (rather humbled, should he read this) director has applied the rudimentary practise of suspense-thriller film-making.
So WHY see this waste of a blockbuster?
This film is, simply put, excellent entertainment. Through it all I kept thinking "This CAN'T be a serious stab at a film, even for M", but I joined the whole cineplex in enjoying the hell out of it. I wasn't bored for a second, nor did I regret spending 6 pound 80 on it. Mrs Jones' antics may be just about the funniest, out-there occurrences i've seen on the big screen in a while, the acting is sometimes absolutely HILARIOUS when it's not (evidently) trying to be funny. It is even more incredible that it manages this feat, despite being directed in such a way that even the biggest metaphor-misser will see that the film is an allegory for environment awareness.
Put simply, please see this film. It will have you rolling in the sticky, sticky aisles, even if you're expecting the director and the cast to pop out at the end and laugh at you for sitting through it.
1/10 for the film, but a 10 for entertainment value.