Do not waste your money on seeing this film.

Rating: 1/10 (15 June 2008)

I went to see this film with a friend last night as there was nothing much on and it looked fairly promising. The cinema was packed, so it was clear that everyone had been lured in by the same false promise (or the complete lack of good films on).
I chose not to tick the 'contains spoiler' box as despite what the title would lead you to believe, nothing very much happens in this film.
It starts with some poor quality footage of a park with two girls sitting on a bench, discussing something as irrelevant and banal as the rest of the film. Forgive me for saying that the combination of the horrifically painful acting, and the director's choice of a cheap, tacky close-up shot of one of the girls' face with wide, 'startled', blue eyes, wasn't going to win any awards.
I wish I could say that the film got better, but it really didn't. The bright blue-eyed girl from the beginning was replaced with another, who sadly prevailed on screen for the duration of the film. I didn't think that it was conceivably possible for anyone to act this poorly, let alone act this poorly and then be cast for a main part in a film, but I was proved wrong by this little gem.
I must credit 'The Happening' with something though; it's the only film I've ever seen that manages to achieve the complete set of terrible directing, horrible acting, poor script, ridiculous plot-line, bad camera-work and bad production. In one scene in a country house, the microphone makes a guest appearance at the top of the screen. It was probably the best actor in the film.
In spite of this, I must say that I did find many parts of the film unintentionally amusing, including the particularly endearing scene when a construction worker falls off the scaffold and his co-worker takes about five seconds to produce an unconvincing reaction. For anyone who still has an ounce of faith in cinematography, horror and, quite frankly, humankind, I advise you strongly to heed this warning: Do not see this film. Ever.