Good premise squandered.

Rating: 2/10 (16 June 2008)

Horribly acted, horribly and obviously foreshadowed from the get-go with cringe-inducing classroom scene and a spoon fed sappy moral that would inspire Al Gore to strangle a spotted owl with his own hands.If you liked the movie, fine, but the people who think the movie was "subtle" and those who hated it didn't "get" it, your arrogance is unbelievable. There was nothing "subtle" about the movie. The moral was spoon fed to us from the first scene with Wahlberg's discussion about the bees. "Sometimes we just don't know why nature does things". (Even more proof that it WAS plants). Scene after scene had cringe-worthy moments and dialog. "I don't feel comfortable expressing my emotions" was said twice--TWICE so we really get it and hope that she will learn to express her emotions (and be ready for the reward of motherhood) by the end of the movie. But DOES she? You'll have to see the movie to find out. "If you take my daughter's hand, you better mean it," cut to slow-motion close up of Zooey taking the girl's hand. The "crazy" plant man talks to the plants and waxes on about hotdogs. But how do we KNOW he's crazy? Zooey helpfully points at him, then points at her temple, twirls her finger, and mouths the word "crazy". Yes, just like your four year old nephew would. And finally, "what was the color of love"? "I can't remember." Are you EFFING kidding me? That's just straight-up insulting. I heard Al Gore watched this movie and promptly went out and strangled a spotted owl with his bare hands Mark Wahlberg was visibly uncomfortable throughout the entire ordeal, as if he hated the movie as much as everyone in the theatre did. The film reached its low point when our heroes encounter a crazy man who talks to plants. How do we know he's crazy? Well, because Zooey Deschanel looks at him and then points at her temple and twirls her finger around, giving us the universal third-graders sign for "crazy". Yes, she actually does that, just in case M Night's ACTUAL DIALOGUE didn't make that clear. All in all, a stunning failure even by the standards of a man who continues to make nothing but stunning failures.