The Greatest Con Man

Rating: 2/10 (14 February 2018)

This review can be summarised by the following contending title ideas I had: 'Children's movie dressed up as something greater', and 'The Prestige meets La La Land... in the toilet'.
All right, I don't usually succumb to the hype machine against my better judgement, but I had nothing to do and wound up being escorted by my 16 year old sister to the movies (or escorting her I should say), and so I resolved to give the film a fair shot and prepared to enjoy myself.
Now, it' not possible to avoid comparisons with The Prestige, so let's start there. Both films have a similar setting, share a major actor, have similar protagonist roles, and, both start with an achronological scene. In the case of The Prestige, the viewer's curiosity is whetted by the questions the opening scene raises, and is rewarded by moments of comprehension later on as the puzzle pieces slot into place. In The Greatest Showman, I was left with my mouth gaping open after having watched a bunch of comical misfits dancing around to thinned down k-pop in what was supposed to be a Victorian setting, all rounded off by the dulcet tones of notable singer Hugh Jackman, of all people, taking the lead vocals.
The next scenes involved such a quick succession of goofs, bad child acting and far fetched hasty story telling so as to prevent me from wiping the wide eyed gawk from my countenance, to the extent that my sister noticed and asked if I was okay. For example, in one shot a girl forcefully spits tea out of her mouth onto the table, in the next shot it all magically relocated to the front of her dress.
The remainder of the film involved a very forgettable and cliche plot, that sort of everything's going well, oh no everything's gone wrong, no wait woohoo everything just rectified itself by an improbably lucky streak of flukes. That's not to mention the numerous plot holes, if you bothered to engage your cognitive powers at all.
I'm no historian, and even I was acutely aware that historical accuracy had clearly been defenestrated in the movie-making process; for example, in one scene a couple put on a public display of passion, which wouldn't have gone down well in Victorian society, but in the scene the surrounding public all gaze as though affected by the couple's love.
The music was themeless, failed to get me grooving even through the veritable cinema sound system, and it clashed with the Victorian setting. People didn't sing like Beyonce in the 1800's. This is in contrast to the oft compared and far superior La La Land, in which the musical pieces meld flawlessly with the film.
I could go on and on about how every aspect of the film was thoroughly uncaptivating, and I came out feeling as though I'd been conned into watching a children's film. I really can't see anyone over the age of 16 genuinely enjoying it.
On the plus side, the acting was generally alright; heartthrob Zac Effron did enough to justify his presence, and some of the dancing choreography was, in my inexpert eyes, quite impressive.