Sad Adaptation of a Wonderful Book

Rating: Null/10 (11 May 2013)

First of all, the good things: The period scenery looked wonderful.
Here is a movie that should have been handled by someone who loves the period, understands the subtlety of this type of literature, and most importantly, might have some familiarity with the period. When Woody Allen explores the period or thereabouts, we know for sure there is a sense of nostalgia. He knows how to recreate the period and respects its particulars, from its very distinctive look to its very specific music.
This adaptation suffers greatly from its anachronisms. For God's sake, what is a hip hop piece doing in the middle of this very boring love story. There were times when I was praying that the new ice age started so an iceberg would go by and put us out of our misery. Everyone with the exception of the actress who plays Jordan Baker and Joel Edgerton appear dazed from the ultra kinetic camera moves and some really blurry 3D. Maybe the audiences who saw it in plain 2D avoided the dizzy spells our group endured.
A doomed love affair, plenty of yearning, grief over lost time, misunderstandings, obvious division of social classes, and so much wonderful material is recklessly ignored so we can be dazzled by some sloppy CGI. My mind kept wondering where was Peter Jackson and the team that put together "King Kong" where we needed it, and in popped the hope Ang Lee could add some of his classy direction and find the hope and pain Leonardo and Carey failed to find in their characters. Yes, they look sensational in their well-crafted outfits, with their dazzling jewels and expensive surroundings. Yes, their souls are nowhere to be seen or much importantly felt.
They knew each other, only to find themselves trapped by her failure to pull through, and as it is expected, there is too big of a chasm between them to make this succeed. We expect tragedy, and it hits with a bang, literally, with the expected debris flying all over the 3D screen.
There is no memorable line, no tribute to the literary masterpiece this came from, only half-hearted deliveries and a tepid narration that contributes little to a classic story that is now certainly doomed. Nevertheless, it looks good for a while.