A movie only a teenager could love

Rating: 5/10 (25 August 2004)

"The Girl Next Door" is one long series of excuses for serving up huge helpings of sex in an apparent attempt to separate the tween/teen male from the price of admission. This very unromantic lol free comedy tells of an about-to-grad HS student body prez who falls for the house sitting babe next door and then learns she's a porn star and sets about to save her from herself so she can be the person she really wants to be. (Ahem) Hirsch makes a suitable centerpiece while Cuthbert provides the babe-a-licious eye candy as this lame comedy only a teen could love kerchunks though huge gulps of sex obsessed filler. Scoffed at by the critics with poor marks from mature adults, this flick is fodder for teens chock full of shameful subliminals, T&A, and sex talk. A guaranteed winner for teen males and their bimbos and a loser for all others. (C)