As Bad as the Two Other Lathimos' Movies

Rating: 1/10 (13 January 2019)

The bad reviews are all correct. The good ones are wrong. This is an awful movie.
I have seen the Lobster and The Killing of a Sacred Deer, but I did not realize that they were done by the same person who also did this movie until after I watched this movie. Had I known that, I wouldn't have watched this movie.
I watched a DVD screener on a stresming site, and I'm very glad that I didn't pay for it; not even through Netflix.
This is not a comedy. If this made you laugh, well then, anything will make you laugh, and I wouldn't want to be friends with a person who literally doesn't know what comedy, or even good dark comedy, is,
I'm starting to think Rachel Weisz really just wants to be a porn star. She's about as sexy as a BIG old tree stump, but she keeps going for these super creepy-trashy character roles, instead of sticking to things like Denial, which had meaning and was based on a true story and a real character. Her hair always looks dirty, and she always sounds like she has a cold.
I know this movie is trying to pretend to be clever and highbrow about having this "deep" message, that actually isn't deep, and that message is quite simply that what you think is good is actually bad, and what you think is bad is actually good blah blah blah. Wow that's profound. It fails so miserably at cleverly and humorously delivering that message that you don't know if the ending is kinky or creepy or sad or ehat. Most people who actually make it all the way through the movie, rewind the ending two or three times to make sure they are seeing the ending. And then you sit there and say "Well, what was the ending?"
And the scenery is nice, because it's England, but you can't see anything in the windowless or nighttime candle-lit areas, because I think they actually really only used candles for camera lighting, so most of it is just dark with flickering lights and shadows.
I didn't care about any of the characters. They were shallow, and the only thing that they exhibited was selfishness; nothing else, because even when they were supposed to be trying to care, they just didn't pull it off I had no sympathy for them. The romping in the forest wasn't cute or funny, it was just stupid. The food scenes were gross; the bedroom scenes were icky and ridiculous (but not in the way that makes you laugh because it's a comedy). I couldn't tell the men apart, because their wigs and exaggerated make up made them all look like the same person, so I didn't know who was whom half the time.
And gee, Collin Farrell missed his chance to be in a third one of the pieces of crap that this guy puts out. Or maybe he finally realized what a mistake he made twice over by being in both The Lobster and The Killing of a Sacred Deer.
Don't waste any of your precious minutes on earth watching any of these three movies. And if you really, really have nothing to, do make sure you watch for free, like I did.