More like the SLOW AND THE SPURIOUS!

Rating: Null/10 (22 March 2002)

Jeez, what a mess!
Unlikely to appeal to anyone over 25, this is one dumbass movie! What were they thinking? "Hey, lets remake GONE IN 60 SECONDS (again) THE ROOKIE and GRAND THEFT AUTO as one flick and save ourselves two sequels! Aside from a half-hearted bit of action at the beginning, a uniquely uninteresting street race and another heist 4/5 through the film, ABSOLUTELY NOTHING HAPPENS!

Youthful angst and in your face testosterone-fuelled stand-offs make up the remainder of the 90 odd minutes of nitro blazing stupidity and irrelevance. Lots of noise for the attention-deficient and no-brainers that must have shelled out squillions of dollars in the erroneous belief that they were having a good time! Even the cars have absolutely no charisma except Vin Diesel's late sixties screamer which provides the ONLY decent 10 second bit of action right at the very end of the film, where because they had no idea how to end it the makers have the two leads disappear off into an unleaded sunset!
Interminable and mind numbingly bland flick for the headbangers. You wanna see car action? Go watch GONE IN 60 SECONDS 2: THE JUNKMAN. You'll never look at Chev's the same way again!