Unremittingly awful

Rating: 2/10 (1 September 2010)

The Expendables has staggered me- how did they manage to throw so much money at a film, and miss so completely? I love silly action movies, and will normally happily watch low quality, over hyped, tongue in cheek dross... I'm quite happy for a movie to be mere "fun" rather than challenging or beautiful. This though has literally nothing going for it- script, character, plot, sense of humour... are all tragically lacking. Even the incessant action scenes are formulaic and rather dull.
Honestly, with all those big names in the cast, how did they fail to have even a single entertaining performance? How hard can it be to put your tongue in your cheek?