The English Patient

Rating: 10/10 (14 September 2001)

There are few films in existence that can take a viewer to such a vast wasteland of stupor and boredom, and then coax him to wander through the three hour long journey. Thank the good Lord I only had to watch it once because if I had to endure such a pointless plot for a second time, well I just don't think I could take it-let me elaborate. The English Patient begins with the amazing avion shots of a battered english Tiger Moth flying high over the rippling dunes of Africa. He's got some babe wrapped up in a parachute in the front seat(Tiger Moth's had a pilots seat in the rear.)Guess what happens next? Bam! He's shot out of the sky and burnt all up to a crisp. Right about then I said to myself,"Who cares?" This pathetic story of a burnt up man lags for hours, each second you feel that there may be a point- a point that never comes! You find out that you dont even like the main characters and that you'd just as well have them die earlier in the movie. This movie sucked from start to finish and needless to say is one of my favorite movies of all time.