Sarah is Worse Than All the Monsters Combined

Rating: 4/10 (15 July 2017)

I just saw it for the first time, and ten minutes later, I'm still in disbelief. How does this have a 7.2 rating on this site? In my opinion, this movie could have been so much better.
I feel like the entire premise falls short. The underlying story that moves this film along just kinda sags. I didn't feel much sympathy for the characters because there wasn't much to them. I thought the part where Sarah (yeah, spoilers) stabbed Juno in the leg was stupid. I mean come on, at least get out first and then talk about that. Sure she was hysteric, but from a survival standpoint, it doubles her chances of getting out alive if they work together. The only reason she left Beth was because there was nothing she could do. It was obvious she wasn't gonna make it. It was an accident! Geez luis. Ya know it's bad when the movie tried to be smart but ended up looking stupider for it.
The Descent tries to set up this emotional framework by that sudden, tragic car crash in the beginning, but it just didn't connect for me. I didn't like Sarah! She kept doing stupid things like wandering off alone and giving snarky comments instead of being helpful. Somehow she turns into a cave assassin, defeating any monster that gets in her way. Instead of pity, I felt annoyed, especially at the film's wonky wishy-washy ending. It felt forced. Another attempt at trying to look smart. I feel like that birthday cake theme (i.e. Sarah's dead child) was undeveloped, and to leave the viewer on that note didn't work for me. What about her husband? No cake for him?
Time for the antagonists (excluding dumb Sarah). The monsters were unexplained, generic Gollum-ites. Jump scares abound in this spelunking misadventure. I felt more sickened than scared, honestly, especially when Juno accidentally killed Beth (that was the grossest part). I thought Holly's leg injury was unrealistic. Bone poking out of your leg?! You'd be in way more pain than that! Not to mention her running off recklessly was remarkably inane.
All in all, it wasn't a bad movie. It just wasn't for me. Stacked up, the convenient coincidences were (cave in, no book, new cave system, lost gear, running blindly into a hole, completely unexplained monsters, killing your friend, then same friend tells Sarah stupid stuff, then because of faint backstory and reasons Sarah effectively kills Juno...........etc. etc.).
tldr; I didn't like it. Mostly Sarah. THE END.