Bloated competence - stick to the original

Rating: 5/10 (9 October 2006)

Idiots often say this: "Oh, yes, it's very good for Hollywood I suppose, but not a patch on the Uruguayan original." Well smack me in the face and call me an idiot, 'cos the 2002 Hong Kong crime thriller Infernal Affairs (Mou gaan dou) is aeons better than the Scorsese-directed, all-star Hollywood remake.
The original was 100 minutes long and so taught you could probably play it like banjo strings. Several of the scenes were filmed with such artistry that they set a new standard in beautifully realised intensity. The plotting was tight, the acting pitch-perfect, and you really felt for the protagonists.
It was, in short, the best cops and robbers thriller anyone had seen in years.
So of course it had to be remade.
Enter Scorsese, Nicholson, DiCaprio, Damon, Sheen, Baldwin et al.
What results is bloated competence.
The set-pieces from Infernal Affairs remain, but are slacker and less well-handled. People in the cinema were laughing where they should have been clutching their heart to keep it in their chest.
The precision camera-work gives way to run-of-the-mill shots. Consider the sloppy execution of the rooftop fall.
The film is considerably longer without any real cause (bar, perhaps, Nicholson's hammy imperative to overplay any role he takes on). Witness the affair storyline, which is an unnecessary sop to the need for a more prominent female role, or the FBI addition, which is completely superfluous.
The end result is simply a lot weaker than the tightly-budgeted, tightly-edited, subtler original.
The only improvement  and I shudder to say this  is Alec Baldwin's role as the wise-cracking police captain, which made me chuckle on many occasions.
Get the original out instead. Please. You won't regret it.