Craptastic

Rating: Null/10 (29 May 2004)

I'd like to start of by saying that I see two - three films per week and end up liking 90% of what I see. I will also say that I was entertained, but not for most of the reasons I'm sure the filmmakers intended.
I won't go into any spoiler detail, but I will tell you this: there was someone who posted on here gushing that the material is original. No. If you've seen "Indepenence Day", you've seen this film. I actually halfway expected there to be a scene where Jeff Goldblum shows up, tells the Air Force to give the main storm a virus, and then we can fly planes into the eyes of the other storms to bring them down.
The script is woeful. I just got back form the film and can't recall a single good line - that came off the way it was supposed to. People laughed but for the wrong reasons (more on that in a second). There's not a single relationship that works, not a serious moment in the film that comes off as anything but campy, and a sense of disingenuity that lasts the entire film. In fact, the idea that an ice age could spread over half the earth in seven days is the most probable part of the whole shebang.
I never really had an opinion on Dennis Quaid before this...but he was terrible. Sela Ward? Dreadful. Jake Gyllenhall? Do something else. Shameful across the board. At (what is supposed to be) one of the most poignant moments of the film, people were laughing. That's how bad it got. In fact, most of the entertainment came from people dropping in their own one-liners here and there.
Shockingly, the movie was still entertaining. The special effects ARE amazing, and I have to say remarkably convincing. Very cool. It would likely never happen like this, but just as with an alien invasion in "ID4", it's extremely interesting to see someone's take on a worldwide crisis.
And that's an even bigger shock: I recommend you go see it. I paid $12.50 and I'm not disappointed. If you were thinking about going already then you weren't going for a good love story, or great writing or Shakespearean drama. You're going for a summer movie. That's what you get here - just be prepared to laugh when you're not supposed to.
Side Note: MINOR SPOILER: I got more of a kick out of anyone at the Los Angeles disaster sequence. I used to live in Kansas, and the tornadoes actually freaked out several people in the audience here. one woman actually let out a pained yelp when the Capitol Records building was destroyed. Good times.