3 out of 10 was my pre-movie rating for this steaming pile, and as I watched and endured, it did not disappoint. The movie did not even reach the 3 mark. It was significantly worse...

Rating: Null/10 (29 May 2004)

Robert Emmerich (writer and director) has just been moved up the list of worst people in Hollywood to the number 2 spot. Sadly to say, he has not reached the pole position, because believe it or not, there is someone worse. I thought Stephen Sommers (director of The Mummy, The Mummy Returns, and Van Helsing) had reached a near untouchable level of lameness with his latest masterpiece, but Robert Emmerich rapidly gained on Sommers with his monster summer hit "The Day After Tomorrow", and if he continues his ways, he will surpass him as the worst person in Hollywood.
Now about the movie. Did anyone read the script??? I'm sure that Emmerich was swamped with work designing the fake wolves for his half-hearted suspense scenes, so he passed the script on to his 5 year old kid to finish the job. Although that would mean that the first part of the movie was written by a competent adult, but that obviously did not happen, therefore, the only conclusion I could come up with was that a crack team of 5 year old kids wrote the script for him, and plagiarized much of it from their favorite episodes of "Power Rangers" and "Teletubbies".
I happen to be a horrible movie aficionado, and I pride myself in watching terrible movies and enjoying them as if they were of Oscar quality. But, this movie put me over the edge when it comes to being able to enjoy a bad movie. As I endured the dialogue that was masterfully written by the team of 5 year olds, I felt a swelling in my skull. It started out like my head was pulsating from the increased blood pressure caused by the anger of having paid to see this movie. It grew more and more painful as I continued to watch. The throbbing was unbearable, and my ears began to ring as if they were trying to stop the sounds from reaching my brain. Finally, the movie ended and I literally ran out of the theater covering my ears and yelling at the top of my lungs. The pain began to subside and I felt better. To ensure my safety, I took a trip to the doctor's office for a clinical diagnosis. I was informed that I had suffered from a brain hemorrhage that could have only been caused by a steady stream of unintelligent speech and poorly constructed scenes. I never thought this could happen to me. I pride myself on bad movies, but this one was just too bad. Once the movie entered my brain, it began melting it like an unstoppable rebel force, and taking away all the intelligence that I had acquired throughout my years. Just a warning to all the people who are even remotely thinking about seeing this movie; AVOID IT AT ALL COSTS!!! You do not want to put your life in danger just to see New York City flooded. If you feel the pressure to see this movie, just sit down, take a deep breath, remove a ten dollar bill from your billfold, and proceed to flush the money down the toilet. That is equivalent to seeing this movie, and it will save you three hours of your life that you can never get back. Or, you can send the money to me, Mr. Harry Balsac, to pay for my medical expenses. Thank you, I know you all will do the right thing.