Batman Rises?

Rating: 1/10 (22 November 2012)

Batman Rises? A better title would have been "Batman The Dark Knight's Bile Rises. Because this movie SUCKED RIPE PUKE!!! I've smelled a mix of orange and pink carnival vomit and pony sh*t that was less nauseating than this Nolan Turd! First of all, why does Bane sound like a bad SNL Sean Connery skit? "I'll take Bruce Wayne's mother's pearl necklace for $200 Alex". Second, WTF are Joseph Gordon Levitt and Anne Hathaway doing here? Levitt's pseudo "New Yorkish" Accent sounds like Joey from "Yugioh", fake, cartoonish and annoying. And Anne Hathaway couldn't pull off action in a porno! She's more of a Pharmaceutical Sales Rep Woman than a Cat Woman. Thirdly, I don't know if all of Bale's passion went into yelling at that PA on the last Batman's set or what, but he just ain't there folks. He's less Batman and more like a harelipped Oxycontin Zombie. Lastly the plot is horrible Hollywood Ghostwriter Crap (The script equivalent to loud elevator music in a tiny elevator). The best line in the whole damn movie which also sums it up well is when Commissioner Gordon say's "We're going down that man hole!".