Opie Gone Iconoclastic

Rating: 2/10 (23 May 2006)

Parentally irresponsible scions of Christ, a scholarly academic who keeps saying "supposably", and that obnoxious jerk-off from "A Knight's Tale" as a fascist Catholic albino psycho-killer who bared his fanny WAY too much. We've arrived at the cinematic stop known as "The Da Vinci Code" ladies and gents.
Robert Langdon (Tom Hanks) gets involved in a criminal conspiracy that has gargantuan implications  during a 24-hour period he has more revelations than Tom Cruise has social embarrassments during the past year. All the ecumenically iconoclastic assertions (theories, really) that are made during this movie have a stultifying effect on the mind  you start to not care about anythingand it seems like that is the movie's goal.
It was funny because as soon as the opening credits started to roll in a pseudo-mysterious way with the clichéd orchestral accompaniment that's supposed to inspire "profundity" I knew that this was going to be a bad movieand it was (oh boy, it was).
BB