Fantasy . . . Mystery . . . Ennui

Rating: 4/10 (11 June 2006)

Audrey Tatou did not take off her clothes? What is the world coming to? No, seriously, this was a bit of a yawner for me, as I have read the non-canonical materials and simply can't suspend disbelief enough to participate in such an absurd conspiracy theory, all at the hands of the diabolical Roman Catholic Church. Lord help us if we have a generation growing up that knows so little about history as to take this film at all seriously. By way of analogy, it would be as if I made a Superman film and forgot to put in the bit about him having super powers. Yawn.
What I really want to know is: When is this director going to bring "The Satanic Verses" to the screen?