Grim and Boring

Rating: 4/10 (18 May 2006)

I'll be short; The Da Vinci Code is grim and boring. A couple of shots are out of focus, the dialogue is god-awful and the plot is muddy and malformed. Audrey Tatou is wasted in the role of the asinine Sophie, and there is a reason why everyone is talking about Tom Hanks' mullet rather than his performance. The hammy dialogue that works in the book does not translate well to screen, and actors who are unconvincing in their performances fumble through the originally interesting and controversial content of the story, rendering it incomprehensible. The one shining light is Paul Bettany, who gifts us with a genuinely compelling performance, even though he is a self-mutilating, nun-murdering albino monk who wears sandals. May God have mercy on Ron Howard and Akiva Goldsman, because the critics won't.