The most slow moving, pretentious sci-fi movie in history. Benjamin is nice but he is BORING!

Rating: 1/10 (3 January 2009)

Yawn .... Zzzzzzzzz.... (movie's still playing) .... Yawn .... Zzzzzzzzz .... Benjamin's how old now? WHO CARES? AND WHY IS HE GETTING YOUNGER?
In the Picture of Dorian Gray with Hurd Hatfield, Donna Reed, Angela Landsbury and George Sanders, Dorian NEVER gets old. Beat that, Benny. At least in Dorian the movie offers an explanation for why Dorian does not become old. With Benny ... NOTHING! NO EXPLANATION! Ya gotta give the audience an explanation.
After giving the matter some thought and avoiding a rush to judgment, let it be known that this celluloid mess is a truly bad movie. This movie contains all the elements found in a clunker: boring characters, pretentious story, implausible situations, laughable dialog, unoriginality and unnecessarily long. Why oh why was this movie made? What was its purpose? It could not have been to entertain because in that regard the movie fails abysmally.
How bad is this movie? There are no words that can fully answer this question. For one thing, this movie is long. For another, this movie is boring. For yet another, this movie is slow ... is ponderous ... is pretentious. An old man who gets young? Okay, what's next? A tall man who gets short? (Oh, that was done in the Incredible Shrinking Man.) A man who becomes an animal? (Oh, that was done in The Werewolf and other similar movies) A intellectually challenged man who becomes a genius? (Oh, that was done in Charly) A man who creates another man (Oh, that was done in Frankenstein). Ugh.
First, in which genre does this movie belong? Science fiction or whimsical drama? For a drama, including a work of fiction, to work the story has to have plausibility, and in this movie the lack of plausibility is glaring. Now if the movie was presented as a science fiction drama then maybe the story could be accepted at face value and judged accordingly. But for this incredibly boring, ponderous, pretentious, and LONG movie, that is not the case. Okay, a man is born old and grows younger. That is a crucial element of the story that demands, indeed cries out for, further explanation. That cannot be accepted as a given because of its fantastic nature. Yet this movie offers no explanation whatsoever, relying instead on the audience accepting it despite it's obvious implausibility. This would be like watching the movie King Kong (any of one of the movies) with no explanation of King Kong's origin (Kong came from an island). Or this would be like watching the movie Predator with no reference as to where the creature originated (the creature came from outer space). Then the movie is so lacking in any kind of dynamism or conflict as to render it stale to the point of being annoying. The main character Benjamin is liked by everybody, even his father who not unreasonably panics when he sees his strange progeny. Also, the use of repeated flashbacks chopped up the story, interfering with its continuity, and starting the movie with an dying elderly woman who could barely talk didn't help the movie either. And by the time the main character has devolved into a child it was way past his bed time, for him and for this over hyped, over baked, overly long and very boring movie.
Actually this movie does have some (unintentionally) memorable scenes. Like when the Benjamin's father is told that he has a new baby son, sees the infant, is absolutely horrified, grabs the baby and then is running all over the place with the baby while being chased by the police. Or when Benjamin is working on a tug boat and throws garbage overboard - into a head wind - and gets covered with garbage. Or when Benjamin has his first sexual experience - with a whore. Ugh.