Every Scary Movie Ever Made

Rating: 10/10 (29 July 2013)

"Okay, let's go over this checklist one more time! We got THE EXORCIST covered?" /Check/ "How about THE SHINING?" /Check/ "Enough stuff and folks tossed around for POLTERGEIST's sake?" /Check/ "Did we remind 'em that pets have a sixth sense?" /Check/. "Toss in the usual stopped clocks, kid's imaginary friend, bumps-in-night?" /Check/Check/Check/"Wait, this is 2013, gotta have paranormal investigators and their gizmos!" /Check/. Don't forget to sprinkle some prerecorded-footage stuff through out the film!" /Check/. "Need evil doll, dammit! We got Chuckie's sister?"/Check/. "Spread the usual cringy stuff like monsters-under-bed /Check/, dead animals /Check/ we-just-moved-here /Check/, secret passageways /Check/, underwater bodies in white gowns?" /Check/. "And, of course, we've pretended that paranormal investigation is a legitimate profession allowing a lucrative lifestyle, prestige, and scientific acceptance, right?" /Check/ "Last but not least we...hee, hee....indicated that the devil is...guffaw.....real and that.... chortle....this is a really true story, correct?" /Check/. "Okay, let's throw it at 'em. They gotta be tired of super heroes by now!"