Limp, Flabby and not much fun

Rating: 3/10 (27 September 2006)

Narnia is a paint-by-number Disney children's movie, and not a very interesting one at that. The characters are uniformly dull and lifeless, except for the little girl, who was a real charmer. I was particular put off by the Liam Neeson's flat, ponderous voice of the lion. In a better movie, the lion would have roared, and the wicked witch would have hammed it up a bit an at least looked like she was having fun doing all those dastardly deeds. Tilda Swinson, always a staid, drab and colorless actress, was her usual drab, staid and colorless self. The special effects were routine. How many times are we supposed to be in awe of seeing animals' mouths move as they speak? The story was nonexistent. There is no explanation given for why the witch does the dastardly deeds or how thing came to be as they were. You would at least expect that in a children's movie, the children would learn some basic lesson about life, about growing up, etc. Here, there is nothing but pure child fantasy. The boys get to vicariously lead and army and fight with a sword and the girls get to vicariously become queen of the realm. There no learning, no awe, no magic, no nothing.