A movie made by people who hate horror movies.

Rating: 1/10 (4 March 2013)

This movie is not a parody of horror movies, it is a parody of bad American horror movies that are obsessed with cutting up teens, and deliberately goes out of it's way to insult the audience.
I won't bother going into the story, everyone pretty much knows it by now.
This movie seeks to suck out all the fun of a real horror movie and replace it with bland non-comedy and dull dialogue. The characters are all incredibly bland and unlikeable,the fact that they are actually impressed by the Cabin itself,which is the ugliest thing ever,makes them look like idiots who need to be culled!lol! These are not actual characters, they are walking clichés that the audience doesn't need to care about, and that,i suppose, is the point of the movie, they must die for the entertainment of the audience and that is all they do. Except in this movie they don't die fast enough,they have to live long enough to explain what is happening to the audience,just in case we can't see it with our actual eyes!
Now onto the parts that insult the audience. *Possible Spoilers*
The "virgin" isn't a virgin- This supposed to be a joke that girls are slutty these days so there just aren't any virgins. But the Stoner character and the Nerd boy were far more likely to be virgins than the attractive girl! The writers just decided to stick to the boring cliché where girls are expected to be virgins.
The "Gods" (the audience) demand to be entertained- This is actually funny because the "Gods" are not entertained enough and start to destroy the world, a bit like the audience they feel cheated! LOL!
What the writers forget is that unlike the "Gods" the audience of a horror movie might also want to be challenged and presented with something that actually makes them think about life,death and choices.
This movie presents us with nothing new, there are funny teen horrors with monsters like Gremlins, or scary thriller horrors where people die for the benefit of an audience like My Little Eye. This is nowhere near in the same league as those movies,The Cabin in the Woods is a complete waste of everyone's time, it might have worked as an hour long TV drama but fails as a movie.