Not worth the hype at all

Rating: 2/10 (30 March 2017)

I wish I could say my poor review was based just on my dislike for Joss Whedon projects alone (not a fan of Buffy or Angel, yuck), but it's not. Several people blew this movie up for me, being careful not reveal spoilers but assuring me that since I enjoy strange and complex films, I would like this. And I really wanted to! I had high hopes that this would be something surreal and humorous...but I was surely let down.
This film is neither strange, nor complex, nor original. For all the glowing reviews here, I am wondering if either I saw a completely different "Cabin" or if the other reviewers have drastically different ideas than I do about what makes a unique horror movie that really "grabs" you.
I 'get' the campy, 'fun nod to old slashers' vibe, and I'm not always opposed to my horror having some comedic elements. However, this film plays like a second-rate Wes Craven dig--- and to me, that's like cheating off the dumbest kid in class for the big test.
The acting is terrible. Predictable dialogue, stereotypical characters (which were meant to be archetypal, but came across played out instead), spitting out their lines as if they'd memorized them or read them from a prompter. The story starts off in a pretty standard format, college kids heading to the woods, so this leaves a lot of room to work with. It meanders into pretty standard fare, then redoubles it. A LOT. All the "fantastic twists and turns" are really just clichés and stereotypes thrown on top of one another in a huge, convoluted mess. Nothing left me guessing. The "Power Rangers" movie has more to it than this.
I won't ruin the film with spoilers, but my take is that if you like things like Angel, Buffy, M.Night Shamalyan, "Scream" (or other later Wes Craven) or the "Saw" franchise--- you'd enjoy this. If you're into black comedy...skip this one, this lacks the depth and intelligence needed to make a killer black comedy. Not for fans of thrillers, psychological horror or cohesive acting.
To its credit, I can see this being amusing for your average high school horror fan, or something.