Positively Vomiticious

Rating: 1/10 (18 August 2012)

Worst movie I have ever seen. It certainly deserves to be forgotten -- I wish I could. Do not watch, it'll make you cry and vomit at the same time. It tries to be funny, referencing at itself and the genre, without succeeding at being funny at all. This film tries to make it clear that there are five caricatures which should be killed at the correct order to satisfy the "Old ones" (i.e. us, the viewers). Wow, how "artsy"; there are werewolves, clowns, pinheads, snakes, zombies, spiders, ghosts, and such. Viewers can not have that much maggots in their brains not to notice this self-referencing stylistic nihilism. Untalented hacks like Whedon, Goddard and Bresson think that discriminating moviegoers enjoy this kind of cheap, pretentious semi-artistic excrement.