Satire on Kwai

Rating: 5/10 (2 October 2015)

This movie can only be watched as a comedy. Very English, and played dead straight.
The Japanese are clueless idiots that can take over huge areas of territory, but have no idea how to make a bridge. A British officer (Alec Guinness), confronted with the uncivilised scoundrels, decides he'd rather spend a month in a heat box in Burma than have his officers work, following the Geneva Convention. Behind schedule and desperate for assistance, the British educated but cringeworthy Japanese commander offers the officer good food and wine, but is rejected. Eventually the Japanese commander relents. After a mere month in an amplified 100% humidity 35 degree Celsius environment, the British officer, showing few ill effects, decides to take over the building of the bridge, to bring a little British civilisation to the jungles of Burma. It's all jolly good show, and very capital, what. It brings great spirit to the men, and they respond with a bespoke bridge, built to last 600 years. They even place a nice plaque on the bridge, celebrating their achievements - written in English, of course.
Unknown to the officer, a group of British-US-Canadian 'commandos' (all four of them) are bringing plastic explosives, with young Burmese ladies to carry their possessions and assist in their baths. They encounter only three Japanese soldiers on the way to the bridge, and are soon viewing the bridge from the nearest hill, alongside the Burmese ladies. One of the team sets plastic explosives on the bridge, with a wire from the bridge that is so obvious, that only a British officer can spot it, and he immediately tries to stop his piece of British colonialism being destroyed - even if it does aid the enemy.
The ending is so absurd it has to be seen to be believed.
This movie is Englishness to its core. If someone asked me to give them a movie exemplifying English culture, this would be hard to go past. It isn't a war movie, it's an attack on the rigid English class system, English superiority complex, and servile masses pushed to its extreme limits. There are so many clues, such as one English officer presenting a suicide pill to the American soldier, but when placed in a situation where he might use it, he is instead carried by several lovely Burmese ladies on a stretcher, right to the bridge. When Guinness, the epitome of the English class system, falls on the detonator, the film is brought to its natural conclusion. You can almost imagine Lean and co's wry smiles if only one person in the cinema actually got it, and roaring with laughter when the Americans gave him an Oscar for a 'war film'.
You can admire it as a satirical comedy. But it is a bit slow.
It is also a bit hypocritical, the English upper class using the hideous treatment of British soldiers for their high farce. So what if a few working class men died, this is art damn it.